(PREVIOUSLY ON BOGGER BOX OFFICE....
The world has being saved by Eamonn...But something is off! Despite Being convinced that he has travelled in time by one year to save Earth, SatanicOstrich used his Powers to sense evil, to learn that Eamonn is being lied to. He Convinces Joe-Jack and it that's not the case and to travel with him to the Planet Harmoris to meet his new Benefactor and Lover!
MEANWHILE IN OUR REVIEW, Paul Rudd is Peter, a man with little male friends who is convinced to audition men to be his best man, leading him to Sydney Fife (Jason Segall) a goofy dude with a strange world view! )
(Storyline continues after the review)
By his house...We meanz Sydney's, A rundown Surfer's Shack With Quirky Ebay buys, Musical Intrstuments, Comikal Bukes and Dat Ole Chestnut, A drum kit! Howeva, it's a Very odd table that getz Ant-Man's Attention
IT'S A TABLE OF MASTURBATION AIDS!
.............
Let's Just Skip to the Next Day, Where Lou Ferringo (As Himself!) Calls Peter's Office, when Sydney arrives, Despite saying he has friends coming over. He acts the Maggot (Namely Pretending to be the Hulk!) and convinces Peter to have a Jam Session, Leading to a Montage of more Man-Dates, More Bodybuilders stepping in dog-shite and more scams to sell The Penthouse!
Turns out Sid woz knot lyin' abou havin otha friendz, dey just can't hang out coz they have Familys now! So dis leaves Ant-man with a 6 foot sammich! Hey. Gud ting he didn't use his powahs, coz if he shrank he'd Nevah finish it!
For...the LAST TIME HE'S NOT ANT-MAN IN THIS FILM! So It Turns out, Zoe doesn't know Much about her future husbands interests. Zoe hasn't met Sid, but will at the Engagement Party her parents are throwing. That is if Sid agrees!
The Party is thrown at a Chinese Restaurant. While dere, Dey plan to Fob Mouthy Girl ov on Sydney, Bad Marriage Barbara and Barry are dere too. It's a recipe for Disaster !
And it is turns out to be Sydney's speech, where he insulates A Private conversation that Peter and him has about Zoe not giving head, To the Mortification of everyone!
At first she's Angry, But Peter takes his side, Saying it's no different from the Gurls Nioght when She Bragged about da size ov HIS!
Peter Sees a Strange Woman Leave the Surf Shack. Sid says he's sorry about what did and Says Hayley (the Mouthy Girl) likes him so they have arranged a Foursome.....
.....Of Golf!
Hayley cant Golf t'save her life and Whacks Sydney in da Kneecaps. She also takes everyone else's time and it cause an Argument that ends with Peter walkin' home, carryin' ev'yting in silence. When they Arrive home. Sid calls Peter with News-Rush is playing a small, one night only concert in a bar and he wants to Invite Peter, But he has Plans So Peter convinces her becoz next Scene...
Peter, Zoe, and Sydney are watching the Rush Concert and having fun, But Zoe thinks Peter and Sydney are having fun without her.
So da Next Day, Da boyz go suit shopping. Whilst Getting Changed Peter tells Sydney he plans to sharin' Commission wif Tevin. Sid Hands Peter some non black tux, sayin' his problem is he's trying to portray himsel as Mr Super Cereal, But he's not! If he cuts loose and be as forward As Tevin he'd be able to sell the Ferringo House!
...AND THIS IS WHEN THE RED FLAGS PILE UP! When Sydney asks " Spare Change Bro?" Namely 8 STACKS! THE FUCKER IS GETTING MARRIED! things are not helped when the gay guy from the Man-date exposes the whole scheme....except he calls Peter a Whore!
So After explaining Sydney agrees to be best man, after all, he's got his 8 grand from his new best friend!....Only to See Tevin having lunch with Lou Ferringo (As Himself!) and Discussin' Sellin' 'is house behind His Back, So Sydney has the "Great Idea" to Punch Da Man who despite being middle Aged, is Still Built like a Brick Shithouse!
Sydney has Driven a Wedge Between Peter and Zoe , About the 8k that he lend A man he just met a month ago! Also Sydney has Poisoned his mind by asking WHY is Peter marrying Zoe and didn't get an answer!
It Gets Worse for Peter when he drives to work, he finds out what Sydney wanted da 8 grand Fer! Comedy Photoshopped Billboards for his Realty.
So this is the Straw that broke the camel's Back! And Peter is Sick of it! The Hypocritical rules, the stupid Classman Behaviour, The fact that the marraige maybe over because of a Stranger he met a month ago. He's not going to lose the future with the woman he loves for a man stuck in the past!
So Sydney is off da Weddin' and iz currently takin' down da signs. Peter iz back wif Zoe when he realizes why he luvs her!
So the Plans fer next weeks wedding reaches fever pitch, Meanwhile Sydney's world view is turned upside down when he realizes what a jerk he's being. When Peter arrives at work, he's flooded with calls from people who saw the signs. Even Lou Ferringo resigns Peter after he got 100s offers from buyers! Embolded, He Smacks Tevin, and tells him to fuck away from his Listings!
It's the day of the weddin' An fer his groomsmen, he picks Dad, Robbie, the old Catfisher, the squeaky -voiced-guy, Lou and The Gay! But Zoe sees Her Fiance Upset, So He calls Sydney to arrive as a guest...Only for the audience to see he was driving to crash the wedding anyway!
SO LETS PUT THE BABY IN THE OVEN!
Last minute Peter makes Robbie the best, man only for Sydney to arrive. He's crashing the wedding to return the 8 Kilos back. We get a title drop and the Wedding vows, But not before We a Flyover for the wedding, paid by Sydney because we see a final photoshopped billboard...one that references the running joke that all of Peters Impressions sound like a leprechaun. During the Credits we see Sydney and Peter cover Rush, Sid forgiven by Zoe, Hayley gets So Drunk squeaky voice man gets hit on! and the Bad Marriage Couple are having a baby (BECAUSE THAT WILL MAKE THINGS BETTER!)
THIS FILM IS ALRITE!
Letz be honest, It's a fillum Ant-man were doin' before he became Antman and will do, when dere is no more Avengah filliums! The Actin', story, and plot were middlin' nothin' to complain, but notin to praise!
(TICKET TO HELL-THE ROAD TO HARMONIS!)
Exiting Warp Drive. The express train to Hell found Harmonis, a small blue and green planet, much like Earth, But with smaller icecaps. So the planet was mostly a tropical Paradise. The train landed in a Romanesque Forum, Filled with Marble Columns, Statues and Urns! The People of this world, named after this planet, were Anthromorphs of Animals. Cats, Deers, Pigs and few Monkeys, Birds all dressed in Roman Clothes of very classes and Castes!
JAYSUS! DIS PLACE! IS DIS PARADISE?
IN THIS UNIVERSE? I WOULD HAVE KNOWN IT EXISTED, IN FACT I ALWAYS THOUGHT IT WAS UNINHABITABLE!
It was...came a Mellifluous female voice, They turned to see a tall blonde woman in a white dress and open toed Sandals, a Belt styled like Ouroboros around her thin waist. her hair was long and dreaded and was practically sweeping the ground behind her! Despite this Alluring appearance, SatanicOstrich sensed her powers and was now caught in a cascade of shock and fear of this woman
MY, MY MY! IF IT ISN'T MY OLD PAL BEELZEBUB! IT'S BEING TOO LONG!
Who is Sabaru really, for Satan to be afraid of? This question will answered In the 2 parts of Dinner for Schmucks, Next when 2 TICKETS TO HELL CONCLUDES!
ONLY ON BOGGERBOXOFFICE!
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