( Ticket To Hell. The Two deaths of E.THE FINAL CHAPTER
PART ONE, Births and Funerals.
to recap, our hero, A fictionized version of myself, was kidnaped by two bounty Hunters, one a German Plague Doctor and the other, a creature who took the form of a memory of something that frightened Eamonn as a child and claimed to be death.
The ones who issued the bounty were Automatons called the Appraiser of Will, Creatures who are Equal to The Many Cosmic Entities we have seen before, but rather than those who play with the Souls of men like a Game, or mark the passage of time with Holidays, These Appraisers of Will, are Both Curators and Relics of their Realm of The Grey Area, the place concepts, ideas and even whole living beings, are taken to be Appraised. To be tested if their will to live is to be extended or left to run out. For a year, as one of the last few text reviewers, Eamonn is subject to humiliation and ridicule by Higher Alien beings.
Until one day doing his reviews, he stumbled on an Evolved power, Similar to The Devil's Dvd that Spurned the Story Starting all those years ago. He found freedom once again by reevaluating his powers, if bad films are no longer bound to physical items, he too must be digital, with the guidance of a mysterious voice, Our hero took power from this realm, and Cloaked in new 8-bit armour, he Became the Pilgrim of The Digital Frontier.
In our world, With Eamonn taken to the Grey Area, His disappearance was treated like a cover-up. Everyone who knew him, acted like he never existed, only by a series of mishaps that could be thwarted by Eamonn's Existence and some Cajoling by Ostrich, did Joe-Jack and the Visiting Cosmic Entities Remember Eamonn. Though the Return of Yusef, Joe-Jack's Counterpart from Earth-3 and the revenge of Sabaru and Eighties Lad when they returned from their Pocket Dimensional prison.
After a skirmish, The heroes convinced the villians and Vigilante to a temporary truce for their own ends. Jusef to return home and Edwin and Sabaru who were convinced they had a given right to kill Eamonn to satisfy their revenge! With The Cosmic Entities powers they got to the Grey Area. However, the Human members soon Succumbed to the Overwhelming Sense of Depression the Realm for forgotten things produces. But their fought through when they remembered their purposes.
While they arrived to break Eamonn out, the Cosmic Entities, revealed there was more afoot with the Appraisers of Will.
One of them Had Malfunctioned and is a Traitor. According to the Entities, one of them had reverted to its base emotions, rather than performing tasks properly. It was Chesed, the Being of Kindess, Eamonn's Ally into escape, who shocked everyone when she of all Creatures had hidden on her Model. What is Chesed's Endgame and surely what real harm can Kindess do to the world?
Chapter 2 will be after the Review section
AND FOR NOW, BACK TO OUR SCHEDULED REVIEW!)
November the 21st 2021 (or November the 22nd If you were in Europe!)
WWE had it's Annual Survivor Series Pay-per-view in the Barclay's Centre in Brooklyn, New York.
As One of WWE'S "Big Five" Events, Survivor Series is an Important date on the Wrestling sphere's calendar.
But the 2021 edition was a day of greater Import.
25 years ago on this Night, "The Rock" would debut.
And the Rock Celebrated this fact....By Not turning up!
However, WWE Didn't just settle for showing clips of the Rock to pad the show, WWE would kill two birds with one Stone-Acknowledge the Milestone, while Providing Promotional consideration for Rock's new film at the time-Red Notice
So what happened Next Blew all the matches out of the water-This was so Bad, this segment is the only thing people remember. The Only thing they Remember is Vince McMahon's Limo and him greeted by a sea of Jobbers who heard him proclaim that The Rock gave him The Golden Egg From the Movie!
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| "AND EVERYONE HATED THAT!" |
With his Advanced Age, his tired ideas and his sins Catching up with him, from 2022 to the year he was ousted 2024, Any stupid Idea and decision was Blamed on the Golden Egg Era!
Having a hate-boner for Muslims? Golden Egg!
Making Corpse-Poker a Champion? Golden Egg!
Firing 60 British Talents and treating their Contracts And Lives like a Tax Deductible? Golden Egg!
But why do we remember This Badly and not be Angry with other Wrestling Promotional Consideration?
Dave Bautista around at the same time, was in Army of the Dead and he didn't turn up on WWE either, instead WWE Promoted the film with a tag match where all the lumberjacks (Extras to ensure noone escapes the ring!) were Las Vegas-themed Zombies....
Including Zombie Elvis! (as the Premise of the film was a Bank raid in a zombie infected Vegas-It's terrible-So terrible I don't need to review it!)
But why do people Hate the Red Notice Promotion and not remember the Army of the Dead promotion?
well that's simple!
Batista is NOT The Rock!
On paper, Dwayne Johnson and Dave Bautista have comparable careers-Both have Headlined Wrestlemania, both have being world champions, Both have won the Royal Rumble and both went to Hollywood before retiring for good!
However the Rock is a bigger star, his era of wrestling was the hottest era with the WWF in a 3 company war for the hearts and minds of a whole generation.
Bastista was from the Era straight after, while Wrestling didn't cool down quickly, It was the era where WWE was starting to monopolize the sport, TNA Was ran by a complete idiot, Ring of Honour would have it's stars go to WWE, and every so often Uncle Dave Melty-Head would get a tingle in his loins about some Untelevised Match in the Tokyo Dome!
But Did WWE's terrible promotion kill this franchise-Or has Red Notice done enough by itself?
Well let's finally check out this exhibition on Red Notice, But to see the artifacts you need admission (UN)luckily you have a.....TICKET TO HELL!
THE FOLLOWING FILM IS RATED 12 FOR VIOLENCE, INNUENDO, AND THREAT. THIS FILM IS INTENDED FOR AN ADULT AUDENCE, AND AS SUCH I WILL BE USING ADULT LANGUAGE, WHICH WILL BE CENSORED, DUE TO GOOGLE'S TERMS OF SERVICE!
Promotional art for this on Netflix is Rock The Dwayne, Gal Gadot and Ryan Reynolds posing, which is lame!
We know this film is bad because it's formed from that Cradle of Evil since Time Immemorial-ANCIENT EGYPT!
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| "DIO'S THEME INTENSIFIES!" |
As AI Nat Geo host Voice Drones on about the Abridged history of the love between Cleopatra and Mark Anthony, we go into the plot that the Roman general Gifted golden eggs to the female pharaoh, 2 were Found, 1 is on Display in Rome, the second has being auctioned Many times. Will we ever find the Lost third Egg?
That is up to whoever is working with scanning technology and Metalurgy to make a fake Golden Egg!
We get the title Drop and the Definition of what a Red Notice is-It's the highest level of arrest warrant issued by Interpol!
We cut to Rome, during a dramatic Car Chase, out of one car given a police escort is Johnson who is playing an Interpol agent who just arrived at a museum.
Some British woman exposits that Johnson is Agent John Hartley, as museum staff even Doubt Hartley is a real Profiler. She continues that Hartley got word that the egg in the collection is to be stolen by one Nolan Booth, as informed by "The Bishop "-A Person the Curator says is nothing more than quote "A Boogeyman of the Art World, a Catch-All excuse, when Incompetent police can't find Thieves".
Using thermal cameras on the Egg at Display and Six class science, Gold Conducts Heat as well as electricity and Radiation, the thermal cameras shows the Egg is not white hot to yellow, But completely Blue on thermal cameras. In other words...
The Curator can't Believe he's being had, But when Agent Hartley finds a kid with a can of Coca-Cola.
1) How Convenient to find an English speaker in Italy! 2) as Hartley said, Food and drink are not allowed in Museums, I've been to Statlely Homes that have been converted into Museums, and I can tell you that family would be thrown out and banned Verbally for not acknowledging the rules.
So Hartley Spills the Coke (All the while with logo facing the camera) and the Golden Egg Dissolves into Brown mush, all the while Nolan Booth (Reynolds) looks on as his crime is being foiled.
The agents call for the Viewing room to he sealed, just as Booth makes a run for it! Sorry Rocky, your athletic prowess is no match for Reynolds' Whippet like legs and being wirey enough to fit through door frames, as Hartley is now Stuck. A smoke bomb thrown by Booth only makes things worse, Reynolds' Stunt double LE PARKOUR'S to Safety dealing with Security Guards with one giving a Wilhelm Scream out for good measure.
Hartley has Booth at Gunpoint, With Booth stalling for time, The British Agent, Das, comes in shouting at Booth to move, (Wait that can't be right!) So The Thief smashes through a window like Father Jack and down a Conveniently placed Tube slide, with Hartley chasing him on the outside climbing across a ledge to an Equally Conveniently Placed Ladder.
Speaking of Conveniently Placed, when Nolan steals a scooter, THERE JUST SO HAPPENS TO BE a Gala of some sort with some Well-To-Do Couple getting Paparazzied on front of a Ferrari, which Hartley steals. We get five seconds of Sabotage by the Beasty Boys, before the Ferrari is totaled by a Hippy Van!
Silly Rock The Dwayne! This isn't Fast and The Furious 28! Nolan gets away!
We cut to Bali, Indonesia 56 hours later-Thanks to a Caption. Nolan is on a speedboat sailing towards a beach resort, Where Booth enjoys his ill gotten gains, only for Hartley's Voice to echo behind him! And while he's out of his Jurisdiction, He can inform local police, as a swat team, storm in and surrounding Booth.
Booth is a complete idiot of a Thief, Proudly Displaying the things he has Stolen.
WHO DOES HE THINK HE IS? THE BRITISH MUSEUM?
Hartley Psychoanalyses Booth and Claims he commits crimes because his father never loved him.
Oh Yes!
The Elon Musk Syndrome!
Realizing "The Bishop" Betrayed him, Booth is arrested for his crimes. The Golden egg is put on a Separate Van from Booth, under the suggestion of Agent Das. And sure Enough the Egg is given to A swat member who is clearly a Shapely Caucasian Women even if most of her body besides Her eyes and hands are covered.
AND WOULDN'T YOU KNOW WHO WON THE PONY, BUT THE ONLY SIX FOOT CAUCASIAN WOMEN SWAT OFFICER IN ALL OF INDONESIA WAS GAL GADOT?
PART 2 WILL BE RELEASED NEXT WEEK!
(Eamonn's Dialogue and review in Black)
Joe-Jack's Dialogue in blue
Edwin/Eighties Lad's Dialogue in Orange
Saburu's Dialogue in Gold
The Cosmic Entities Dialogue's in Green
Yusef's Dialogue in Aqua
Chesed's Dialogue in Pink, Bolded and Underlined as to denote a sense of authority!
The 2 Deaths of E.THE FINAL CHAPTER
Part 2. How Dangerous can Kindness Be? You'd be surprised.
To say the others we surprised by Joe-Jack's accusation, was an understatement. But as he explained that the Entities or "Da God Babbies" as he called them said the Malfunctioning Traitor was a "she" and since Binah, the other female voice tried to convince Chesed not to do whatever she planned to do.
She made an indignant noise. Then another. Then Another, soon she was repeating the same recording of the noise until it developed into a crazy laugh. Like one of Countess laughs.
Bra(ehehe) vo! You Finally (Hehe) got it! Actually. Flip it. Reserve it. You got what I wanted.
Before they could react, A Hidden grappling hook attached onto Sabaru. The limbs connecting point opened like a flower, and a pestil like Syringe drew blood, and as quick it fired, it retracted back to Chesed.
"The power you have, to Create Life, not only because you are an organic Female, but your species' quirk to warp organic matter into your Minions under your sway. One fills me with Jealousy, and the other Disgusts me."
The blood Bonded with the Embalming fluid that sustained the umbilical cord that is Chesed's true form. But the new mixture started to boil in the canister. She cried out in pain, but it was hard to feel sad for her when she then screamed in wild excitement. The cord turned into a few ova with was fertilized in the liquid, which was now an artificial womb. Even the inorganic parts were being transformed. With her scream reaching its highest note. A light enveloped the pod, when the arena illuminating light died down the pod was still glowing, but it was no longer a cylindrical machine, but something that warped into something humanoid.
Glistening under a layer of residue fluid, after her Rebirth, Chesed picked up a smashed piece of her Glass Canister to peer at her new form. Taking a moment to admire her pink skin, and metallic golden pointed fingernails, she saw her new form. Brunette shoulder length curls that were topped with a flower garland, her hair framed her round soft features, a round face, a smooth chin, dimpled checks and dangle earrings shaped like Astrolabes. In contrast to her warm, almost friendly face, was the coldest Harshest, Yellow-Brown eyes, hard and unfeeling like Quartz, where accented by false eyelashes which looked like Typebars for a typewriter. what started as a Sentient Umbilical cord, she was now a Curvy woman who looked like an adult, modestly dressed in a sari made of fleshy tentacles, of the same colour of dried blood, that contrasted with green accents of ivy bound on her bare footed legs.
But the transformation wasn't done yet. Sensing her Audience, she straightened up and bloody wings formed out of her shoulder blades and pointed down her back.
It was Yusef who spoke first after a shrug and a sigh....
(Beat)
You know, the moment they start to transform and give themselves Iconography and a crown, they might as well, just put on a Sandwich board that says "Look at Me, I'm Evil!"
How very Cynical. I See you came from a World where your gods forsaken you. Do not judge me by their actions. Though I will forgive you for doubt all the same.
Oh very kind of you. However, its Gods like you that made World's like mine. Gods who the fattened pigs of the Bloody Empire like to scream anthems that "God Saves" them. Like Empire and oppression is divine providence.
Sabaru turned to Eighties Lad, and got his attention
(Psssst, what's going on?)
(Long Story Short, Yusef is a Joe-Jack who comes from a world where the British Empire still rule)
I see. Your Lack of Faith is due to Some of Humanity claiming the Expanse of God's Will to themselves and Themselves alone.
I will see what I can do.
With a squishy sound, the Flower above her forehead in her garland, turned into a third eye. Chesed was being transmitted news feeds her mind filled with images of starvation. With Protests and the Smug smiles and venomous words of Leaders less Self-aware than she was.
So, I see. You are a Species who are suffering.
You are fighting over resources you don't have for everyone.
You are missing the point, yes there is suffering in the world, but we have the solutions already. Its just that not everyone will listen.
If there was a Solution, you would have used it. No. IF I PROVIDE WHAT HUMANITY NEEDS, MORE OF IT! WHEN IT IS NEEDED, THEN I CAN TRUELY BE THE TRUE EMBODIMENT OF KINDENESS!
(Chesed raised her arm over her head, the sky darkened as the ground shook, something had appeared in Space that scraped past the surface of Mars.
Edwin pulled out the 3d shades which projected the Images of what was coming towards us.
Dude, This Chick is Psycho!
tHIS iS a pLAY tHAT iS a dANGEROUS GAMBIT!
Jaysus! Iz Dat...what oi Fink it iz?
"Yes! The thing Chesed has summoned to Earth...."
(Everyone stared at the wormhole that had its contents float towards our planet. It was a sphere as big as our planet. When the sun shone on it, the realized why it was this size.)
".....Is Another Earth!"
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