Joe-Jack Reviews Ghost Town

(As Joe-jack is reviewing part 1, all spelling mistakes are intentional.)
(PREVIOUSLY ON BOGGER BOX OFFICE...
Joe-Jack was given the chance to atone for his past deeds by the ghosts of Christmas also gaining insight into how to destroy the creature known as Master Control. In revealing this, the last spirit revealed himself to be Satanic Ostrich, the Devil of the Enlighteniverse, who is convinced Joe-Jack's soul is his, Satan has darkened the doors of Enlightened Towers)

(Joe-Jack opens the door to see satan standing in Hell.

YOU'RE DOOMED! YOU BELONG TO ME FOREVER!!!
I tole ya, i aint payin' no property Tax!
(SLAM!)
-No it's me you cretinous...cretin, The Lord of Darkness!
-Oh Right! Now, wot's dis abou' ownin me soul?
Because i do....
Noah! noah ya don't cause last month woz....(hold on)....MAMMY!
(WOT?!?)
WOT WOZ DAT BIG TOWNIE WORD DAT TOWNIE BASTID USE T'DESCRIBE LASHT MONTH'S REVIEW?
(NON-CANON!)
DAT'S RIOTE, Non-cannon, it didn't hav' a cannon in it, not even soljas! so sweep be fucked!

Don't be so hasty! Remember you said that you don't remember pushing Edwin Tantalus into the freezer at mary's shop in 82? what if i restore that memory!
After sending 80's lad t'another dimension? i suppose i have no choice
there is of course, a catch!
yeah?
you must review a film for your soul! You survive, you get your stolen memrory. You fail, I get your soul in exchange for this man's
(the foul feathered fiend held a glass ball in the palm of his wing, in the ball the soul of Ricky Gervais did the brent dance in endless loop!)

he sold his soul to me!
-to make him funny?
-to convince the world he was!
AND NOW OUR FEATURE PRESENTATION!

Hallo Joe-jack here, today reviewin' for my very soul, A film starin' da Unfunny Goblin himself, Ricky Ger-Vase! Gervase's Komedy is akin to seein' a Happy-Slappin', you laugh at first but then you feel sorry for da bastard. But dat has not stopped da papers fer callin' him a Komedy genious! he has to send an idiot and a midget t'out foriegn t'raise a laugh! but we are laughing at dem not GerVase!

AnyRoad, da Fillium starts wif a man's voice asking if anyone iz there?
"Why are there so many empty seats?"
No, da voice belongs to Frankie(Greg Kinnear), who is channelin' Jimmy stewart with his nasally accent, speakin t'his wife (later revealed to be played by Tea Leoni) about buying an apartment for their anniversary. Meanwhile, a family ov Black Stereotype are getting rid of a stolen air conditioner.
Out of a window.
Ov a flat.
A few stories high.
In New york.
A city famous for it Law Enforcement both of Murders and Enviromental Laws.

And while that might have being a whimsical "what-are-da-odds" way ov killing Frankie, he is actually killed by a green screen bus that turns into a real bus.
(To Paraphase Chris Jericho, no that doesn't look like a fucking comedy bus to us!)
So Frankie is a ghost who feels terrible abou' leavin' his wife to live without him.

We now cut to Doctor Bertram Pincus (Gervais), a dentist.

Dat's funny cos oi'd rather have me teeth pulled out be rusty pliers than watch anything with Ricky Ger-vase in it.

After fiove minnits ov stock footage of Dentistry Equipment. We see the real reason Oi don't like Ger-Vase. he always plays pricks.
So Pincus' real problem is dat he is so focused on his job that he was no time for friends.
or Conversation.
or hobbies,
Children,
Pets,
Charity,
Human warmth!

To dat end, he takes 3 bottles of Heavy Duty Laxative!
(keep it classy, Ricky keep it fucking classy!)

After stayin' in hospital after an overdose and followin' operation, he leaves and accosts the nurses for smoking outside, speaking to a nurse OVIVIOUSLY dressed in 40's nurses' attire because she is a ghost, gets all the ghosts in new york to follow him.

the next day Pincus is told he died on the operation table. Which is the explanation to why he can see da dead.

No.
No Dat's not an explanation!

So Frankie gets Pincus alone so he can convince hin to mind his widow.
An' dat iz da plot t'Ghost Town.
Actually dat's da plot t'Ghost Whisperererererer and if i had a choice, I'd pick Jennifer Love-Hugetits anyday ov da week.

We are told that the dead appear in the clothes they die in. and by proxy what they have in dere pockets can be pulled put. Turns out dat frankie has a Blackberry with four bars! but da batteries has died. as he was playing tetris.
Because da plot says so!

Any way, Frankie tells Pincus that his wife will marry a lawyer. After convincin' the other dead to back off, Frankie cources Pincus-Without-A-Brian to seduce his wife.

Turns out dat Pincus has being a real jerk t'Gwen since his building.

Frankie tries t'give Pincus advice but he Ignores da Deceased Don Juan, After dicussing the jawbone of a mummy she was studying.(she is an Eygptologist), Gwen invited Pincus to study it with her.

So Gwen and Pincus have a date and what do you take about as an Icebreaker?
how about a MUMMY'S FULLY PERSERVED ERECT PENIS IN A JAR?

Despite the dick jokes and the fact it's ger-vase tellin' dick jokes, Gwen warms up t'Unfunny Goblin, inviting him to da unveiling of a new egyptian Display. While trying t'check on Gwen he is intreruptted be a ghost ov a naked man and ov a...(sigh)
I.R.A. TERRORIST!
(WHAT?)
(racist alarm!!)
tag!
I'll be finishing this film now.Part 2 it's going to be on!

Spurned by the cry of the Racist Alarm, Eamonn takes up the challenge of finishing the review for his frie-acquaintance's soul. Next week, on bogger box office-Plus Big Announcement!