Wednesday, July 17, 2013

BOGGER BOX OFFICE SPECIAL:SONIC UNDEGROUND

Hi there, everyone, I'm sure if you came here via a search of "nostalgia critic Sonic underground", You've come to the right place. Sort of. The Bad news is I'm not Doug Walker, I belong to his forum, the good news? After 14 years, Sonic Underground is being reviewed by TGWTG, So what's the problem?

3 years after the aptly named DIC(K) Entertainment cancelled the cult favourite SatAM, DIC's European Studio in France took a shot in creating it's own version of Sonic's already Fractured Multiverse, the Result? A sonic Cartoon that has polarised fans but in true Sega Form, none of S.U.G's characters make an appearance in any game. At least SatAm was to have a game! Don't Believe Me? Behold!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MfujuAK9FXA
So this Month, The storyline is on hold. This is a serious analysis of Sonic Underground with Links (when available!) to Important Episodes in 2 seasons, 40 episodes of Sonic's 3rd and last outing as a Western Animation. This is Sonic Underground.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2y2kCEV1fMc

We are off to a good start, the theme is rocky and memorable. It's also where the shock sets in to what's new.
"Triplets born/the throne awaits"
In this alliteration, Sonic has a green brother and a pink sister.

Fanboys are now screaming,
"A Green male and a pink female hedgehog? OH NO! SCOURGE AND AMY ROSE ARE IN THIS! WAIT Amy Rose, Sonic's Stalker with a crush is his Sister in this?...EWWWW!"

Hahaha, No they are new characters, the green is Manic and the pink is Sonia.
Great, new characters, That has always worked well for Sonic in the past(!)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YjkMzNTkj6E
The First Episode begins in a Non-French way, with the first episode being an Origin Story. Like all the series episodes, this has Narration by the hedgehogs Mother, Queen Elena. the Story is no different from that of SatAm  with a few differences. Robotnik has taken over Mobius but rather than completely Weaponising his citizens and turning the planet into a wasteland, He uses Tax and the financial backing of the Nobility to stay in power, this causes the working class to rebel and fracture in the resistance or the Underworld, Either way the only punishment is Robotisation, no matter what road you take.

The 3 baby Hedgehogs were separated, Sonic living with his Uncle Chuck, Sonia living with Lady Windermere and Manic was Stolen, and then raised by, the Thief Lord Farrell. Because of this all 3 acquired skills that made them unique, which I will get to in the character assessment at the end.

By the Time the Hedgehogs are teenagers, they are visited by the Mysterious Oracle of Delphious, Who tells each the existence of the others. It's thanks to this asshole aardvark that the comfortable lives of Sonic, Manic and Sonia are ruined forever, As the oracle also appears in front of Robotnik and gloats about the Trio's existence. So Robotnik ends episode 1 the cruelest way he knows how. By capturing and robotising the Hedgehog's Uncle and adoptive parents. Our heroes naturally want to save them but Instead Oracle puts them on a quest to find their mother, Citing that this was always going to happen, As their Deaths was part of their Destiny!

I KNOW, WHAT A DICK-MOVE!

You Don't see Anyone in the Lion King say "Simba, Scar killed your Da, BUT HEY! Wouldn't you rather be raised by the Comic Relief?"

As This is a brand new alliteration of Sonic, New enemies are Introduced. As well as Nobles, like Sonia's fiancée Bartleby, in Robotnik's pocket, He has 2 bounty hunters/tax collectors named Sleet (a jackal) and Dingo. Like Scratch and Grounder, they are Bumbling Henchmen, but are also formidable
opponents, as I 'll get to later.

In the Second Episode, the Siblings are given tutors to hone their Skills and reveal new ones. Sonic learns the Speed Dash, Sonia can create tornadoes with her Wonder woman Spin, while manic....Can throw drumsticks!

Later in A Scared Temple, the Oracle, being the wanker he is, Summons a monster as a "Test". While the correct action was to let Manic pick the lock, Sonic's Impulsiveness got them all Killed. The Oracle refuses to teach them further. However the trauma of having their families killed in front of them has bonded the 3. So the oracle says that is their test: of their unity!

So this is where the Oracle reveals the true power of the Medallions they all wear, And Yes I'm getting to why the show is hated. If you don't know what it is. Please read the below paragraph before you learn/remember.

(BEFORE GOING FURTHER, PLEASE TAKE THE TIME YOU COULD USE TO READ THIS PARAGRAPH TO GET A STIFF DRINK BEFORE STARTING AGAIN. LEAVE THE HOUSE A BUY SOME IF YOU DON'T. WHAT'S THAT? YOU DON'T DRINK? YOU POOR BASTARD! YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT'S COMING!)

Sonic Sings.
Badly.
Once every Episode!
The Medallions turn into Musical Instruments which are Weaponised. Sonic has a laser Guitar, Sonia, a keyboard/smoke Machine and Manic has an Earthquake making Drum set. They are also have the new powers as Plot demands of curing Robotisised victims for short periods of time and are empathic with the location of Their Deadbeat Mother.

Oh Yes! I SAID IT!
The Main mission of the Sonic Underground is to recover Queen Elena, Despite doing fuck all for her kids for 10+ years, they cannot defeat Robotnik without her, because...I have no Idea!

Without going through all the episodes and only focusing on Plot-line episodes(As small as the amount is!), the 3 travel across Mobius whenever Elena is spotted, or when Robotnik makes a lunge for power, in their Tourbus!

I Guess they perform on the A-team's methods of incognito!

After Rescuing Trevor, Leader of the resistance, But losing Argus the Queen's Guard to the Robotisizer, returning to their birthplace and foiling a fake wedding, the story continues in episode 9 "tangled webs"

Robotnik has blackmailed a lion called Cyrus to find the resistance stronghold or he'll robotisize Lionel, his father and Inventing Rival to Robotnik. He finds out the Stronghold "sanctuary" is just that, a place for the children of the resistance can be safe. Cyrus has a change of heart, but learns his father was robotisized anyway. and joins the resistance as the hedgehogs personal liaison.

After freeing the people of Tashistan, Lake Valley and Port Mobius, as well as passing the idiot ball between themselves and Bartleby, (each of the 4 where a victim of a trap and needed rescuing in the space of 1 episode each!) the penultimate episode of season 1 had own of its crowning Moments: It was the tv debut of Knuckles!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-_fETXISglU
Season 2 Started with 1 of the better episodes, when in Rome, Where that Jackass the Oracle returned and sent the heroes off to a roman era Mobius, without their powers. Using only their natural abilities (which is Bullshit, as Sonic's speed is a Natural Ability, you clearly show a baby Sonic using it in your opening credits!) the Oracle, disguised as a Minotaur, Returns the 3 to Robotropolis.

After falling into traps on a daily basis, as well as finding, and destroying, a magical scroll, What follows are 4 episodes that came from left field.
first the Else-World-esque "Six is A crowd".

With people reeling from this well good episode, what was to follow was a 3-parter that felt like a Satam episode Collectively Dubbed Chaos Emerald Crisis.

However this was the shows peak and for the last 10 episodes it was business as usual, coming no close to finding Queen Deadbeat, the last episode didn't even bring her up!

Sonic Underground will always be remembered as the cartoon that detached itself from the actual storyline, Using an established character and changing the world around him.

Let's finish this with some Character Assessment.

In it's own right, Mobius gets developed. Consider the background art for Adventures (Who-gives-a-shit-Land) and compare to to the diverse Su Mobius.  Granted it's cues are all from Earth not any Sonic game, but having different locals gives the adventure some legs.

The Swatbots and Robotisized victims make a return. And I hate their new design. In Satam, the Robotisized Victims look scary as hell, like skeletonised suits of armour, here, they are not even trying put a metal gauntlet, a meg leg a telescopic eyepiece and/or a bulkhead for armour and Bam!, instant heel turn. Even the swatbot look less threatening as they go from basic black to Pink and purple.

Acting as the series Starscream, Sleet is constantly branching out from Dr R and kissing up when caught. Despite this he is a dirty coward, picking on children and rarely getting his hands dirty, and fleeing when his swatbots and Dingo fail.

Dingo is the Dumb Muscle of the Robotnik Regime, who thanks to a remote device by Sleet can turn him into anything, of course being a cartoon the the transformations have a tell as Dingo is the only orange coloured character. This where Sonic own disguises come back to bite him, As no-one seems to question the spate of informants with orange skin wearing purple bifocals with Aussie accents! 1 flaw of dingo is his crush on Sonia, and some faux flirting will distract the lug.

Bartleby, while not evil is seen as more as an annoyance by the hedgehog brothers, and doesn't understand beyond family ties why Sonia would help such "riff-raff". However losing it all during the events of episode 37 Bartleby the Prisoner makes him Join the Resistance. And is never seen again.

Robotnik, while not as vile as his SatAM Counterpart is just as Heartless and capable of vile acts. Such as the sinister and disturbing act of Robotisizing a Baby to commit genocide of the children in Sanctuary. and melting polar ice caps just to kill sonic even if it meant dooming the planet for everyone else. He's composite Character, his adventures voice with his SatAM design. He is still foiled by cartoony methods like Chased by the Boggin in the Oirish-themed RACIST ALARM! Episode 39 and hypnotised by a Fran Dresher-bot (context!)

Now to our heroes.
Queen Elena...has no character development. She is a narrator and a deadbeat mother. Moving on!

Having the least development are Trevor and Cyrus. only so far as they Mission control, meaning that when we see them they give us exposition of what the mission is. Which is far more spy-like and fleshed out than Satam's ATTACK! ATTACK! ATTACK Tactics, here it's diverting supplies or sabotage. This is what my counterparts mean by telling an adult story for children, which they do well when they want to be serious!

One can argue that the Oracle is the real Big bad of the series, playing robotnik and sonic against each other and the player stays on to face him. But I'm probably reading to much into his questionable behaviour, he's more of an Aloof Ally.

Manic's my favourite character. With his skills as a thief, he's the Teams only Badass Normal. He does get jealous of Super Speed, as evidenced in Sonic Tonic. Being Homeless for all his life, he tries to opt to stay in Mobodoon. He also is them most emotionally driven, especially after the nightmarish ending to 3 hedgehogs and baby, He seems that the fight for freedom to it's toll, Until Art's sacrifice Gave him hope. Old habits die hard, as he can't keep his fingers at bay when in Bartleby's company.

Most of the Character Development. goes to Sonia. From being the vain, prissy elitist neat-freak to 1 of the charter members of the Resistance. She falls into the smurfette principle, Getting lots of costume changes and has at least 4 male characters being shipped to her.

Sonic hasn't changed since Satam. He is still cocky arrogant, reckless and easily angered. He learns these lessons here but it feels like he's learning those lessons again after SatAM.

Despite the annoying Songs (though some are catchy), the real gripe of this series is the need to constantly Yank the Dog's chain when it comes to finding the queen. Every time they get close, an attack, Sonic's fear of water or just the writer's stupidity to hammer home an Aesop,gets in the way. One of the biggest FUCK YOU!'s happened early on in episode 15, where Manic fell asleep guarding a magic mirror, when Elena came out and kissed her son and buggered off before he woke. maybe because if he woke or turned to see Sonic or Sonia, She would be a guest on Mobius' version of Maury!

Not finding queen Elena is not their only failing. Given who Robotnik has robotisized in 40 episode the regime has crushed the resistance in statregicly and in the battle. He had robotisized Chuck, Farrell and Lady Windermere thus breaking the hedgehogs spirits and put them on the run. He also robotisized Lionel an inventor thus turning out more robots without needing sleep or food. not to mention robotisizing key members of the resistance like Argus, the queens guard and 6 Resistance leaders. and here's the kicker, he robotisized Titus, a con artist who had the secret of curing robotisization. Clearly robotnik won. and if they could fight back it before the show was cancelled they had the work cut out for them.

However much like what they did to SatAM, Archie comics have discussed an adaptation of Underground though discussions so far with all parties have pushed it into Develepment Hell.

In the end, you can see why Sonic fans don't discuss this cartoon without swearing. as it's Sonic in name only. Though i would like to see the story  finalised just so see the pacing issues of the last season catch up on them.

CREDITS
This Special Review was Written, Edited and Compiled by Eamonn Bermingham,
With Clips from Sonic Underground
Sonic is Property of Sega, Whilst Sonic Underground is Produced by Cookie Jar (formerly Dic Entertainment)
All clips belong to their respective owners,
All Rights reserved.

NEXT MONTH: THE INFERNAL LODGER PART 2: EAMONN GETS KIDNAPPED, FORCED TO REVIEW DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THE MORGANS?

Monday, July 1, 2013

SatanicOstrisch reviews Meet Dave part 2

(Previously on bogger box office....
Depressed on being defeated over and over by Eamonn, Joe-Jack and 80's Lad, Satanic Ostrich Quit his job as Satan! With nowhere to go, Ostrich prepared a job interview of sorts by reviewing Meet Dave to earn his keep!)
(This month's theme, because of the stupid love-plot between Gina and Dave, Robyn's the Girl and Robot aka I'm In Love With A Robot)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SfckrfOYAy4
After seeing a painting, Gina asks the robot his name. After a lame joke that most of the world are Chinese, 1 uses the name Dave as his cover, he blatantly tells Gina he is an alien between talking like a dictionary, drinking ketchup like soda and LOUDLY Crushing eggs behind her back, she's too much of an idiot to notice,

After kicking her cat, Dave notices PG FILM CLICHE#1-DEAD PARENT PHOTO And her son Josh holding the meteorite. Gina tells Dave that he is at school and always carries the meteorite everywhere.

Meanwhile, Our subplot is planted as a conspiracy Theorist Cop and his long suffering partner are on his trail.

After more Shameless Advertising, this time for Apple, The crew are beginning to lose their minds. 17 becomes a black stereotype, 2's mind is blown by Humanity's history of disregard for each other, and seeing a couple kiss makes 3 Have deep-set feelings for 1.

Passing the school playground in his white suit makes every child think he's an ice-cream man. Despite not having anything pertaining to Ice-cream, the children still follow him.

And here's me using my Jimmy Saville costume like a sucker!
(AUDIENCE BOOS!)
AHHH FUCK OFF! I'M THE FUCKING DEVIL! I'M SUPPOSED TO SAY SHIT LIKE THAT!

After buying new clothes and causing a scene, Dave replicates money by...Farting some. Stumbling onto Broadway, 4 turns gay by seeing musicals.
YES MUSICALS WILL DO THAT TO YOU! THAT'S WHY I MADE THEM!

Josh is being bullied at school and the meteorite is stolen because of plot convenience. Dave arrives and asks the principal where is the 5th grade class, the principal assumes he is a substitute teacher without ever asking his background.

Wow, Eamonn, That sounds like the Education Policy of your home country of Ireland, AMIRITE?
(AUDIENCE BOOS!)
OH FUCK OFF, YOU PAID!

After giving the class a theorem for renewable Energy, Josh is separated from his class and tells him that the meteorite was stolen by PG FILM CLICHE #2 SEMI RETARDED BULLY who hangs out at the deli after school. At said Deli, Dave diffuses an armed Robbery.
(Ostrich reads from a dictionary)
Incognito: Adj 1 Having a false identity 2 doing things the opposite of meet Dave!

Josh tells Dave the bully left during the robbery but will be at the PG FILM CLICHE#3 CROWDED FUNFAIR tomorrow.

Back at the crashsite, a cast of Dave's face is created by police, after the robbery it's not long til 2 and 2 are put together.

In the ship, the Nilians exposure to human emotions are referred to by Dr. 0 as a virus, 4 adopts a Parlarie(gay) accent, 12 starts to paint, 17 uses Ebonics and we get background on 1 and 3, who have being friends since childhood, they too, despite being the more level headed of the aliens are overcome with emotions after watching It's a wonderful Life. (despite the setting being August, and this not being a Christmas movie, which means it'll be shown on bank holidays for years to come!)

Number 1 has 12 hours to the meteorite before his space-ship dies. So naturally we show him wasting time in a funfair! This leads to PG FILM CLICHE#4 GIFTS=ROMANCE!
This Leads to the ship Dispatching all the food by jettison using Multiple Toilet splashing sound effects.
I Didn't mention it as it wasn't conductive to the storyline of this film, BUT WHAT'S WITH ALL THE FART JOKES? This isn't Thunderpants, though it looks more appealing compared to Meet Dave!

Finally the Plot is back as Josh tries to get the meteorite back from the Bully, Dave wedgies him to obtain it. While 2 wants to absorb the water and leave us Pitiful Humans to die. The other Nilians are having too much fun. After suffering a concussion, the Limited power reserves of Dave take a hit that looks like a heart Attack to humans. In Hospital, a MRI Blows daves cover. Out to dinner number 17 gets drunk on Dave's mojitos and dances out off the ship. Inside the ship, 4 Enshewing his uniform for Camp Gay threads, gives 3 a makeover. 2 is if anything having a Villianous Breakdown. The cops arrest Dave just as 2 takes over the ship, Causing a jailbreak. 2 exiles 1 and 3 out of Dave. After a scene completely ripped off from toy story, 1 and 3 return to Dave. The cops find 17 and helps him get back to Liberty Island.

Let's end this misery.
Number 1 overrides Dave, but the meteorite makes contact with water and begins to syphon it, but Dave sacrifices his remaining 10% of his power reserves to save Earth, But Josh uses the cop's tazer to recharge his batteries, the cop returns 17 as Dave's crew escape from a rescue pod in this foot.

Oh and the Nilian's Planet is still doomed, but hey, every film by 21st century FUCKS must end with sequel bait, right?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JoYWdHe4tQ4
MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
The Misery from his film fills me with joy!
Does Eddie Murphy have a fetish for terrible CGI? Cos this makes pluto nash look like Black Swan in comparsion. Murphy cannot do an English accent (why?) and his supporting cast are all hams. No two-ways about it. It's a film that's destined to be shown at any and every bank holiday. Like Thunderpants, it thinks that fart jokes will it entertaining to children. And fails miserably.

Very good. And though I may regret it, you can stay, but only if you can get a job. But you can have my spare room.
I DON'T TAKE TOO MUCH SPACE~#!
(Ostrich turned into a puff of smoke and flowed up the chimney, Laughing his wicked cackle!)

CREDITS
Meet Dave was Reviewed as SatanicOstrich, Compiled and Edited by Eamonn Bermingham
With clips and music from
Tom and Jerry the movie
and The Girl and Robot by Robyn
Meet Dave is property of 21st Century Fox
All clips belong to there respected owners
All rights reserved
NEXT MONTH MYSTERY REVIEW REVEALED OR LOG ONTO MY MAIN SITE, pathofenlightment.blogspot.com for Reveal post.