So You Are Probably Thinking, that you have a Pre-Conceived Idea that I am going to Hate This Film!
For those who have known me for years they are probably thinking "WHAT! Eamonn Bermingham, The Rassling Critic, the Caffiend, The Clown Prince of Controversy, Mr Insomnia, The Midnight Cooker is reviewing a musical? he probably HATES IT!"
...But i am no Manly Man, despite being a wrestling critic, I have a soft Creative Side Otherwise these post would be unreadable slabs of text...like they were when i started!
So Today is a 1st, and after 10 years I certainly didn't think i would have anymore of those! But here we are with one of Last Year's Winningnest films But the real Question is...Can a Man enjoy a musical (That is Not The Blues Brothers?)
Are we Looking at a new Iconic Film Scene ? I would like to think so!
The Film starts in a traffic Jam as the camera pans to every car playing a different style of music, until the 1st Musical Number kicks in and Ends with all the car occupants leaving their Vehicles to dance!
This Remake of Everybody Hurts By REM is weird!
We even have the Unfortunate Implications of the only Hispanic Dancers, a Mariachi troupe...Hidden in the back of a Lorry!
(Yeah also i don't want to be hit with any copyright strikes so i am keeping the photographs to a bare minimum! if i can use a song to critique or an image to make a song, that's when i will use it!)
As the Extras Return to the Cars and Reality,
Sebastian (Ryan Gosling) is trying to fix his cassette player as 2 cars in front, Mia (Emma Stone) is rehearsing her lines and holding Seb up, to which Mia flips off Seb!
5 Minutes in and you are making me break out 2 Memes? OK!
Mia is actually a barista in Starbucks on the Warner Bros Lot, But is an aspiring actress, But is late for an Audition and wouldn't you Know It, She walks into someone Holding Liquid At Arm's Length?
For those who have known me for years they are probably thinking "WHAT! Eamonn Bermingham, The Rassling Critic, the Caffiend, The Clown Prince of Controversy, Mr Insomnia, The Midnight Cooker is reviewing a musical? he probably HATES IT!"
...But i am no Manly Man, despite being a wrestling critic, I have a soft Creative Side Otherwise these post would be unreadable slabs of text...like they were when i started!
So Today is a 1st, and after 10 years I certainly didn't think i would have anymore of those! But here we are with one of Last Year's Winningnest films But the real Question is...Can a Man enjoy a musical (That is Not The Blues Brothers?)
Are we Looking at a new Iconic Film Scene ? I would like to think so!
The Film starts in a traffic Jam as the camera pans to every car playing a different style of music, until the 1st Musical Number kicks in and Ends with all the car occupants leaving their Vehicles to dance!
This Remake of Everybody Hurts By REM is weird!
We even have the Unfortunate Implications of the only Hispanic Dancers, a Mariachi troupe...Hidden in the back of a Lorry!
(Yeah also i don't want to be hit with any copyright strikes so i am keeping the photographs to a bare minimum! if i can use a song to critique or an image to make a song, that's when i will use it!)
As the Extras Return to the Cars and Reality,
Sebastian (Ryan Gosling) is trying to fix his cassette player as 2 cars in front, Mia (Emma Stone) is rehearsing her lines and holding Seb up, to which Mia flips off Seb!
5 Minutes in and you are making me break out 2 Memes? OK!
 |
| FIRST THEY HATE EACH OTHER NO THEY LOVE EACH OTHER, IT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE...AM I A ROBOT? |
DON'T YOU JUST HATE IT WHEN A THING THAT DOESN'T HAPPEN IN REAL LIFE HAPPENS?
Naturally Mia, doesn't get the part, as she steps out of the shower and into a second Music number, one that Exposists that Mia is sharing a flat with 3 other actresses, they convince Mia to come to an a-list party, on the hopes to sleep around for work, but Mia is quickly abandoned, her car towed away. Blocks from home, Mia passes a speakeasy bar where she is enthralled to enter by a sad piece of music...We now cut to the same day from the traffic jam in the Perspective of Sebastian, a Jazz Pianist who was conned out his money recently, money he was saving to open his own jazz bar, but one that doesn't as tacky as the place he is currently working at ("They are now serving "Samba Tapas" Pick one thing, and do it right!") His Sister (Who he thinks is no help whatsoever) has the big idea to hook up Seb with one of her friends, Despite Seb being an old romantic.
It's November, so Seb is reduced to playing Christmas songs by his boss for snide patrons, Depressed he starts playing the sad piece that entranced Mia into the bar. This gets him fired, despite noone giving a monkey's! Mia goes to compliment him, but Seb recognizes her from this morning and barges through her!
It's Spring now and Mia is at a pool party, despite still a Struggling actress. She Spots Seb at work as part of a 80's cover band, playing the Keyboard. Mia Requests a song, a real hidden gem and one of my favourites, I Ran by A Flock Of Seagulls here is the original version!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iIpfWORQWhU
It's the kind of song and performance that gets the stuffy Pianist out of his comfort zone, however Seb is still too up his own hole to take the joke, Ironic that Mia, who doesn't realize how good she really is, is the one that pulled the joke
Walking home together, Mia thinks it's strange they keep running into each other. Looking over at Hollywood heights whilst looking for her car ("Look at this place, it ain't much to look at! But somehow people still come here!") Leading to the scene of the cover-Magical Stuff!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=waTDxRZ93Qc
After telling Seb where she works, she is shocked to see him turn up on the Warner Lot in the coffee shop she works at ("I just lifted the bar when the Security Booth was empty! I think I has 5 minutes before I'm banned from the Tour for life!") Mia explains her acting obsession comes from her Grandmother, who was one in Paris, Sadly her choice in life has not being that successful. ("My last audition was pitched as A teen drama set in-and sponsored by KFC!") After saying she hates Jazz, Seb brings her to a jazz club on their date to convince her otherwise! ("Jazz is not elevator Music, It's not suppose to be relaxing, It's Musicians Playing over each other Without Feelings gets hurt! it's Conflict and Compromise, The same piece of music will sound different every time....and It's Dying!")
Mia gets a back to an Audition, but the agents don't care. We also learn That Mia is seeing a second guy, a Yuppie Air-Conditioner salesman, leaving Seb high and dry on their next date, until she hears the Sad Music over Greg's waffling and leaves dinner to see a movie with Seb...which promptly breaks down! Mia and Seb go to a Planetarium after hours and they dance....in a scene that looks like Fry's Holophoner Sequence from Futurama's Parasites Lost!...SERIOUSLY COMPARE THE TWO!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=udEEat65JMc (SORRY ABOUT THE QUALITY!)
Inspired, Mia starts writing her own play. It's summer now and she and Sebastian have being dating for a while now as evidenced by a montage! (we even have a funny scene of Mia and Seb getting revenge on the bar that fired him by destroying the sign advertising the Samba tapas!") Seb is working too in Real Jazz bars, as few as they are, Mia is fully into jazz now and they are loved up!
As great And as Great and Organic this Relationship feels, This is a Romantic Movie after all. 10 chapters in and I am BEGGING! for some Tension!
And we get it With a former Bandmate offering Seb a Job, with Seb not happy to see Keith. Mia has Opening Night Jitters about her play, which is a one woman Show.
Seb takes Keith's Job...and we find out why we Seb refused for so long! Keith uses Synths and Autotune...And this pisses Seb off...However Keith makes a good argument and Seb has sold Out! Unbeknownst to Mia who is finalizing her play. Seb starts touring with The Messengers In Chicago so the two will be apart for the 1st time ever.
Mia sees the concert when the Messengers tour L.A., And is shocked and concerned about how Commercialized the music is and Seb playing a Synth. The Concert gets a Blackout Cut and the screen reads "FALL", not just the season but a clever bit of
Mia is still writing the play, so she is shocked to see Seb in her house cooking her a romantic Dinner. But Seb wants Mia to come with him on tour, so he her to give up on the play. So that's it! Seb has sold his soul to the Machine, He was giving up on the club and his dream! Seb retorts he had to give up on his dream to have a steady job....ONE OF THEM HAD TO! When Mia asked him what he meant by that, Seb accuses Mia of only going out with a failed musician...To make herself feel better about being a failed actress! The Cold Silence is broken by the sound of a smoke alarm telling us dessert has being ruined!
With Seb Touring and Mia still in California, the relationship is truly over! Mia has not took it well, as her play is now about the break up! Seb still wants to support Mia, but turns out the Play is on the same night as a photo shoot! Mia's play opens in a community theatre, with next to no-one in it! During the Photo shoot, Seb is annoyed by the photographer, (It's clear that in Seb's interaction's with Bar-staff, bar patrons, and others, he has little patience for those who know nothing about music) when he tells him to pose "and pretend like your playing" It's only when he plays the sad song again and the photographer compliments him, he get's an epiphany: It Doesn't matter if people have to know about music as you do, all that matters is if they enjoy what you are doing and leaves for Hollywood for the play! Sadly, Mia does not have the same realization. Her audience (or rather the husbands who were dragged here!) pans her play and when Seb arrives she is distraught, blaming him for giving her the stupid idea in the first place. She Moves back to Nebraska. With nowhere to Crash, Seb still has a key to her Flat. It's there he is woken up by a phone-call for Mia. Hours later in Nebraska, the tiny village is woken by Seb's car horn. Seb has Drove all the way to tell Mia her play was seen by an Agent who has offered her an audition at 5pm, he will be back at 8am, to drive her back in time.
The next morning Mia turns up and Returns to Hollywood, she is surprised to learn that the job is for an actress-SCRIPTWRITER Job. The Agents tell her, they have a set in Paris, they have Bank, what they don't have is a script! It was so refreshing to see a actress who writes her own plays, they add, so they ask her, what would Mia's Film about Paris be about. Mia tells them her grandmother was an actress, her story becomes a song!
So let's Finish this!
After the Audition Seb asks what the future has for them now, and as they contemplate that decision, fall has become winter....5 years later, Mia has returned to the coffee shop she worked at...as a success in France! She is also married...to her agent! (they also have a daughter!), and they plan to go out and eat, but are stuck in traffic! David asks Mia if it's ok to just eat at the closest restaurant they find. So they find a Jazz Bar...Seb's Jazz Bar! Going by just his fame alone in the Messengers, The place is packed, despite Seb playing real jazz!
Seb sees Mia in the crowd, and takes over from his pianist to play! He plays the Sad song and it puts Mia in a flashback to 5 years ago in the tacky bar, But instead of barging into her, he kisses her as it turns into a "What Might have being" scene if they stayed together, Mia would still get the role In Paris, they would marry, have a son...But they would go to this bar that Seb won't own in this universe and he would be unfulfilled. And Mia would be unhappy because Sebastian would be!
And so the film ends With Mia and Seb, Not together, but achieving all the happiness and success they were due!
THIS FILM IS EXCEPTIONAL!
I'm sorry if you thought i was going to rip into this like so many romantic comedies in the past, But this was not the case. The Cinematography is Beautiful, But it's bright colourful costumes and neon lighting is a veneer of saccharine, The Abandoned Mansions and empty Theatres, the overgrown gardens of long dead actors' residence, the Murals of Golden age Hollywood icons, crumbling away with age, shows us that Fame in Hollywood is a cruel game, sometimes, as evidence by this line by Ryan Gosling, when talking about his former place of work's Samba Tapas ("It's Ridiculous! Isn't it? combine one culture with another, just because they both speak Spanish, That's Hollywood for you, They Praise something and then they discard it just as fast!") Speaking of Gosling, his Physical acting was on point, not like stunts or anything, I mean his facial expressions. Just watch his face when he is forced to play only 3 Christmas songs at work. you can just see and feel the tension and disgust in his face and his playing in every note of "Tis the Season". Emma Stone was a hoot! Stone's over the top facial expressions during the auditions and her flirting with Seb at the 80's Party was hysterical. But The true Triumph of this film was it's musical numbers! Taking Nods to classics and even Disney! The Academy is very happy to learn, that they can make them like they used to!
MAGICAL.
A TRIUMPH!
AND TO ANSWER MY QUESTION ON TOP-YES! A MUSICAL ANYONE! CAN ENJOY!
CREDITS
La-la Land was Reviewed, Compiled and Edited by Eamonn Bermingham.
With Music and Media from:
Nostalgia Critic
The Simpsons
"I Ran" By A Flock Of Seagulls
La-la Land
Futurama
DpYGO's Youtube channel
"La-la Land" was produced by Lionsgate. All media used Belongs to their respective owners. all rights Reserved.
NEXT MONTH:
A BRITISH MOVIE THAT MATTHEW BUCK CALLED APPALLING AND I WOULD HAVE DISAGREED...IF I HADN'T MATURED SINCE IT WAS RELEASED!
THIS AUGUST!
AND NOW CONTINUATION ON OUR STORYLINE-HEAVENSCAR
In the Subways of the Floating City of Heavenscar, a city made of a mosaic of different world's to block a hole in the fabric of reality, Seams are slowly forming on even the patchwork that is holding reality together!
Eamonn, now a cursed burnt out mess after his friend's betrayal, dresses himself with one arm, his bad arm, his left, he has a right arm, but it's wrapped in a cloth bindle.
He has a right arm, but the arm wrapped in a cloth bindle....IT IS NOT HIS ARM!
Stumbling on his feet, he sees an Anomaly, a tear in space/time. A small one, thank god! he undoes the knot on the bindle, revealing his cursed arm, he has changed by the power of the devil's dvd's before, but not like this, this arm is now transculent and insect-like. Every bend and Flex made liquid gather in bubbles, like deposits of resin or honey, his elbow to the skin on the bone side of his arm all the way to his knuckles, resembled the husk of a giant insect. His fingers were now huge ashen blocks that were held together by glands of amber like resin.
His huge hand grabbed the anomaly, the portal was crushed by the ashen fist, the amber resin glowed, it even boiled under the skin, Eamonn looked down on at his arm, the amber has started to crystalize his shoulders now, and maybe it was he was still shaking , but he was convinced the husk's wings moved!
"Well looks like it's time for the Council Meeting. Time to put some trousers on!" he said!
It's Spring now and Mia is at a pool party, despite still a Struggling actress. She Spots Seb at work as part of a 80's cover band, playing the Keyboard. Mia Requests a song, a real hidden gem and one of my favourites, I Ran by A Flock Of Seagulls here is the original version!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iIpfWORQWhU
It's the kind of song and performance that gets the stuffy Pianist out of his comfort zone, however Seb is still too up his own hole to take the joke, Ironic that Mia, who doesn't realize how good she really is, is the one that pulled the joke
Walking home together, Mia thinks it's strange they keep running into each other. Looking over at Hollywood heights whilst looking for her car ("Look at this place, it ain't much to look at! But somehow people still come here!") Leading to the scene of the cover-Magical Stuff!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=waTDxRZ93Qc
After telling Seb where she works, she is shocked to see him turn up on the Warner Lot in the coffee shop she works at ("I just lifted the bar when the Security Booth was empty! I think I has 5 minutes before I'm banned from the Tour for life!") Mia explains her acting obsession comes from her Grandmother, who was one in Paris, Sadly her choice in life has not being that successful. ("My last audition was pitched as A teen drama set in-and sponsored by KFC!") After saying she hates Jazz, Seb brings her to a jazz club on their date to convince her otherwise! ("Jazz is not elevator Music, It's not suppose to be relaxing, It's Musicians Playing over each other Without Feelings gets hurt! it's Conflict and Compromise, The same piece of music will sound different every time....and It's Dying!")
Mia gets a back to an Audition, but the agents don't care. We also learn That Mia is seeing a second guy, a Yuppie Air-Conditioner salesman, leaving Seb high and dry on their next date, until she hears the Sad Music over Greg's waffling and leaves dinner to see a movie with Seb...which promptly breaks down! Mia and Seb go to a Planetarium after hours and they dance....in a scene that looks like Fry's Holophoner Sequence from Futurama's Parasites Lost!...SERIOUSLY COMPARE THE TWO!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=udEEat65JMc (SORRY ABOUT THE QUALITY!)
Inspired, Mia starts writing her own play. It's summer now and she and Sebastian have being dating for a while now as evidenced by a montage! (we even have a funny scene of Mia and Seb getting revenge on the bar that fired him by destroying the sign advertising the Samba tapas!") Seb is working too in Real Jazz bars, as few as they are, Mia is fully into jazz now and they are loved up!
As great And as Great and Organic this Relationship feels, This is a Romantic Movie after all. 10 chapters in and I am BEGGING! for some Tension!
And we get it With a former Bandmate offering Seb a Job, with Seb not happy to see Keith. Mia has Opening Night Jitters about her play, which is a one woman Show.
Seb takes Keith's Job...and we find out why we Seb refused for so long! Keith uses Synths and Autotune...And this pisses Seb off...However Keith makes a good argument and Seb has sold Out! Unbeknownst to Mia who is finalizing her play. Seb starts touring with The Messengers In Chicago so the two will be apart for the 1st time ever.
Mia sees the concert when the Messengers tour L.A., And is shocked and concerned about how Commercialized the music is and Seb playing a Synth. The Concert gets a Blackout Cut and the screen reads "FALL", not just the season but a clever bit of
Mia is still writing the play, so she is shocked to see Seb in her house cooking her a romantic Dinner. But Seb wants Mia to come with him on tour, so he her to give up on the play. So that's it! Seb has sold his soul to the Machine, He was giving up on the club and his dream! Seb retorts he had to give up on his dream to have a steady job....ONE OF THEM HAD TO! When Mia asked him what he meant by that, Seb accuses Mia of only going out with a failed musician...To make herself feel better about being a failed actress! The Cold Silence is broken by the sound of a smoke alarm telling us dessert has being ruined!
With Seb Touring and Mia still in California, the relationship is truly over! Mia has not took it well, as her play is now about the break up! Seb still wants to support Mia, but turns out the Play is on the same night as a photo shoot! Mia's play opens in a community theatre, with next to no-one in it! During the Photo shoot, Seb is annoyed by the photographer, (It's clear that in Seb's interaction's with Bar-staff, bar patrons, and others, he has little patience for those who know nothing about music) when he tells him to pose "and pretend like your playing" It's only when he plays the sad song again and the photographer compliments him, he get's an epiphany: It Doesn't matter if people have to know about music as you do, all that matters is if they enjoy what you are doing and leaves for Hollywood for the play! Sadly, Mia does not have the same realization. Her audience (or rather the husbands who were dragged here!) pans her play and when Seb arrives she is distraught, blaming him for giving her the stupid idea in the first place. She Moves back to Nebraska. With nowhere to Crash, Seb still has a key to her Flat. It's there he is woken up by a phone-call for Mia. Hours later in Nebraska, the tiny village is woken by Seb's car horn. Seb has Drove all the way to tell Mia her play was seen by an Agent who has offered her an audition at 5pm, he will be back at 8am, to drive her back in time.
The next morning Mia turns up and Returns to Hollywood, she is surprised to learn that the job is for an actress-SCRIPTWRITER Job. The Agents tell her, they have a set in Paris, they have Bank, what they don't have is a script! It was so refreshing to see a actress who writes her own plays, they add, so they ask her, what would Mia's Film about Paris be about. Mia tells them her grandmother was an actress, her story becomes a song!
So let's Finish this!
After the Audition Seb asks what the future has for them now, and as they contemplate that decision, fall has become winter....5 years later, Mia has returned to the coffee shop she worked at...as a success in France! She is also married...to her agent! (they also have a daughter!), and they plan to go out and eat, but are stuck in traffic! David asks Mia if it's ok to just eat at the closest restaurant they find. So they find a Jazz Bar...Seb's Jazz Bar! Going by just his fame alone in the Messengers, The place is packed, despite Seb playing real jazz!
Seb sees Mia in the crowd, and takes over from his pianist to play! He plays the Sad song and it puts Mia in a flashback to 5 years ago in the tacky bar, But instead of barging into her, he kisses her as it turns into a "What Might have being" scene if they stayed together, Mia would still get the role In Paris, they would marry, have a son...But they would go to this bar that Seb won't own in this universe and he would be unfulfilled. And Mia would be unhappy because Sebastian would be!
And so the film ends With Mia and Seb, Not together, but achieving all the happiness and success they were due!
THIS FILM IS EXCEPTIONAL!
I'm sorry if you thought i was going to rip into this like so many romantic comedies in the past, But this was not the case. The Cinematography is Beautiful, But it's bright colourful costumes and neon lighting is a veneer of saccharine, The Abandoned Mansions and empty Theatres, the overgrown gardens of long dead actors' residence, the Murals of Golden age Hollywood icons, crumbling away with age, shows us that Fame in Hollywood is a cruel game, sometimes, as evidence by this line by Ryan Gosling, when talking about his former place of work's Samba Tapas ("It's Ridiculous! Isn't it? combine one culture with another, just because they both speak Spanish, That's Hollywood for you, They Praise something and then they discard it just as fast!") Speaking of Gosling, his Physical acting was on point, not like stunts or anything, I mean his facial expressions. Just watch his face when he is forced to play only 3 Christmas songs at work. you can just see and feel the tension and disgust in his face and his playing in every note of "Tis the Season". Emma Stone was a hoot! Stone's over the top facial expressions during the auditions and her flirting with Seb at the 80's Party was hysterical. But The true Triumph of this film was it's musical numbers! Taking Nods to classics and even Disney! The Academy is very happy to learn, that they can make them like they used to!
MAGICAL.
A TRIUMPH!
AND TO ANSWER MY QUESTION ON TOP-YES! A MUSICAL ANYONE! CAN ENJOY!
CREDITS
La-la Land was Reviewed, Compiled and Edited by Eamonn Bermingham.
With Music and Media from:
Nostalgia Critic
The Simpsons
"I Ran" By A Flock Of Seagulls
La-la Land
Futurama
DpYGO's Youtube channel
"La-la Land" was produced by Lionsgate. All media used Belongs to their respective owners. all rights Reserved.
NEXT MONTH:
A BRITISH MOVIE THAT MATTHEW BUCK CALLED APPALLING AND I WOULD HAVE DISAGREED...IF I HADN'T MATURED SINCE IT WAS RELEASED!
THIS AUGUST!
AND NOW CONTINUATION ON OUR STORYLINE-HEAVENSCAR
In the Subways of the Floating City of Heavenscar, a city made of a mosaic of different world's to block a hole in the fabric of reality, Seams are slowly forming on even the patchwork that is holding reality together!
Eamonn, now a cursed burnt out mess after his friend's betrayal, dresses himself with one arm, his bad arm, his left, he has a right arm, but it's wrapped in a cloth bindle.
He has a right arm, but the arm wrapped in a cloth bindle....IT IS NOT HIS ARM!
His huge hand grabbed the anomaly, the portal was crushed by the ashen fist, the amber resin glowed, it even boiled under the skin, Eamonn looked down on at his arm, the amber has started to crystalize his shoulders now, and maybe it was he was still shaking , but he was convinced the husk's wings moved!
"Well looks like it's time for the Council Meeting. Time to put some trousers on!" he said!
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