"When she Stood there in the circle of chalk we made, i thought we hadn't summoned a Devil, but an angel!"
Well, safe to say that the Earth from where i am from is different to your world is an understatement! In my Earth's time line The Explorers of the New World came to the Americas looking for a valuable metal!
Gold!
No...though they did pilfer gold from the natives, They where after something not sacred, but taboo, a metal from the stars...The Natives called it "The Green Death"...
URANIUM!
Yes, Privateering was built on Progress and War, not greed! In What took your modern Society on electricity 2 centuries, we on Earth 3 had 7 centuries previous!
"had?"
Yes i'm getting to that! Ireland in earth 3 is yet to have it's Independence, thanks to that fool Guy Fawkes! The Uranium Plot only served to displace all of London, including the Queen to Dublin, even going so far to rename it New London! A decree was sent out, Electricity in large areas was banned, Industry was now powered by Steam and Sweat once more, and Electricity was now a novelty at circuses, Giving passing ladies a shock and moving frog's legs with static, what was archaic, was modern, once more.
I Was member of a Masonic Offshot called the Sons of Prometheus, a organisation wanting to return Real Progress and Electricity to Britain! As a Mason i was also fascinated with applying alchemy using Theatrical Magic to inspire people and bewilder Royal Guards, It is then i heard of the Process in China called "Chi". Boarding a Clipper headed to China for tea, paper and opium, i went to investigate more!
The Trek was Arduous, during my time avoiding capture by Cossacks after stealing the flower of a Bride on her wedding night, a meteorite landed in front of me, or so i thought in the ground a spinning discus bore into the ground, it's light in the noonday so was mesmerizing, the sound as it spun, hypnotic. I Didn't care if the edges would chop my hand off, i needed to hold it! a piece lodged in my hand and the world seemed to alter, the crater was gone, like i had dreamt it in a funny afterthought!
In the Crater's place was the Cossacks, i learned too quickly that my moment of weakness at the wedding party, had left me unarmed. Going for broke, I clenched my Left fist and then it happened. as i did the words entered my mind and i said it!
"HADOUKARA PUNCH!"
Seeing my entire arm on fire, the foes ran, realizing what was going on, my body caught on to the pain of being burnt!
"But the Flames are an Illusion!"
-I DIDN'T KNOW THAT AT THE TIME!
As i was contemplating death, a old man came to my aid, a Sensei, a man i was seeking the whole time, turns out he was seeking me the entire time, but now i know the truth of the disc that gave me this power, and Eamonn. since reviewing it contents make you seal away it's evil powers, I give this to you!
(Yusef Picks up an Ornate Wooden Box inside it the dvd of Click!)
AND NOW OUR FEATURE PRESENTATION!
From the Soundtrack- which is pretty solid, but it's this song that has storyline importance
Linger by the Cranberries
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G6Kspj3OO0s
Well I Hope you Enjoyed Yusef's Backstory because Enjoyment has left the building!
No, Scratch That! Enjoyment Left the Building and got Ran over trying to cross the Street! This Month's film is one by the Head of Hollywood's Bad Taste Brigade, Rob Schiender's Daddy, Adam Sandler
Oh look it's his face on a white backdrop! how original!
But at least he's holding the Universal Remote to let people know what this film is about! You can't read the buttons but most of them is about skipping Bad Days and Muting Mother In laws, because if you have a Remote that gave you the Powers of God!, you'd use it for stupid self service! The only buttons missing are "Rewind To The Late Nineties!" and "Pause Before My Career Got Flushed!"
The Film Starts with a great metaphor of this film, a Static screen Panning out to Adam Sandler Crash out in his Pants! As his kids try and steal his Product Placement Box of Twinkies, as his wife (Kate Beckinsale) Looks on, With all the remote on the table Sandler is too thick to know which one is his. His Son explains that the O'Doyles has a Universal Remote that works on everything!
Well That's a lie!
I had Universal Remote before and they only work on the 1st thing you point it at and even then the battery life on them is Booty! the kids ask them when is he going to finish building the treehouse
PLOT POINT!
Turns out Michael (Sandler) has a whole lot on his plate, than building a FUCKING! Treehouse, The Smarmy Well-to-do O'Doyles, A hellish Commute and his dick of a boss played by David Hasselhoff, who is a sexual harassment Suit waiting to happen (And Is That Sophie "No junk in the trunk" Monk i see? In a film with another actors i hate? WHAT IS THIS? A HOLLYWOOD LEGION OF DOOM?)
And then....(Sigh) SCHIENDER TURNS UP!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ukJ8mBnWxnY
This time, Sandler's Buttock Buddy is playing (though uncredited!) a migonistic Prince, who wants to build a resort so he can perv on Western Women! Ammer (Hassellhoff) being a dick, Makes Michael work overtime, making him miss an important swimming gala, turning up late, he gets an earful from his father, Howard, he also gets uncomfortable meeting Bill the swimcoach who is more of a father figure to Ben than he is!
Cut to the Fourth of July, And Michael's Workaholism is Worrying his mother and daughter, that and beating up some teenagers, Michael has got a cold, Donna is on his case about not spending time with his kids, the final straw is being to stupid to tell a toy helicopter remote with the tv remote, hitting himself in his Potato shaped Head! He storms off to buy an Universal Remote in the Dead of Night. Stopping At Bed, Bath, And Beyond, he Meets Morty (Christopher Walken) who gives a jerk who doesn't know who good he has it, THE MOTHER OF ALL UNIVERSAL REMOTES!
HOW BAD WILL GIVING THE POWERS OF GOD TO A JERKASS BE? WELL HAVEN'T YOU SEEN BRUCE AND EVAN ALMIGHTY? IF YOU REALLY WHAT TO KNOW...COME BACK ON THE FIRST WEEK OF NOVEMBER FOR PART 2 ONLY ON BOGGER BOX OFFICE!
Well, safe to say that the Earth from where i am from is different to your world is an understatement! In my Earth's time line The Explorers of the New World came to the Americas looking for a valuable metal!
Gold!
No...though they did pilfer gold from the natives, They where after something not sacred, but taboo, a metal from the stars...The Natives called it "The Green Death"...
URANIUM!
Yes, Privateering was built on Progress and War, not greed! In What took your modern Society on electricity 2 centuries, we on Earth 3 had 7 centuries previous!
"had?"
Yes i'm getting to that! Ireland in earth 3 is yet to have it's Independence, thanks to that fool Guy Fawkes! The Uranium Plot only served to displace all of London, including the Queen to Dublin, even going so far to rename it New London! A decree was sent out, Electricity in large areas was banned, Industry was now powered by Steam and Sweat once more, and Electricity was now a novelty at circuses, Giving passing ladies a shock and moving frog's legs with static, what was archaic, was modern, once more.
I Was member of a Masonic Offshot called the Sons of Prometheus, a organisation wanting to return Real Progress and Electricity to Britain! As a Mason i was also fascinated with applying alchemy using Theatrical Magic to inspire people and bewilder Royal Guards, It is then i heard of the Process in China called "Chi". Boarding a Clipper headed to China for tea, paper and opium, i went to investigate more!
The Trek was Arduous, during my time avoiding capture by Cossacks after stealing the flower of a Bride on her wedding night, a meteorite landed in front of me, or so i thought in the ground a spinning discus bore into the ground, it's light in the noonday so was mesmerizing, the sound as it spun, hypnotic. I Didn't care if the edges would chop my hand off, i needed to hold it! a piece lodged in my hand and the world seemed to alter, the crater was gone, like i had dreamt it in a funny afterthought!
In the Crater's place was the Cossacks, i learned too quickly that my moment of weakness at the wedding party, had left me unarmed. Going for broke, I clenched my Left fist and then it happened. as i did the words entered my mind and i said it!
"HADOUKARA PUNCH!"
Seeing my entire arm on fire, the foes ran, realizing what was going on, my body caught on to the pain of being burnt!
"But the Flames are an Illusion!"
-I DIDN'T KNOW THAT AT THE TIME!
As i was contemplating death, a old man came to my aid, a Sensei, a man i was seeking the whole time, turns out he was seeking me the entire time, but now i know the truth of the disc that gave me this power, and Eamonn. since reviewing it contents make you seal away it's evil powers, I give this to you!
(Yusef Picks up an Ornate Wooden Box inside it the dvd of Click!)
AND NOW OUR FEATURE PRESENTATION!
From the Soundtrack- which is pretty solid, but it's this song that has storyline importance
Linger by the Cranberries
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G6Kspj3OO0s
Well I Hope you Enjoyed Yusef's Backstory because Enjoyment has left the building!
No, Scratch That! Enjoyment Left the Building and got Ran over trying to cross the Street! This Month's film is one by the Head of Hollywood's Bad Taste Brigade, Rob Schiender's Daddy, Adam Sandler
Oh look it's his face on a white backdrop! how original!
But at least he's holding the Universal Remote to let people know what this film is about! You can't read the buttons but most of them is about skipping Bad Days and Muting Mother In laws, because if you have a Remote that gave you the Powers of God!, you'd use it for stupid self service! The only buttons missing are "Rewind To The Late Nineties!" and "Pause Before My Career Got Flushed!"
The Film Starts with a great metaphor of this film, a Static screen Panning out to Adam Sandler Crash out in his Pants! As his kids try and steal his Product Placement Box of Twinkies, as his wife (Kate Beckinsale) Looks on, With all the remote on the table Sandler is too thick to know which one is his. His Son explains that the O'Doyles has a Universal Remote that works on everything!
Well That's a lie!
I had Universal Remote before and they only work on the 1st thing you point it at and even then the battery life on them is Booty! the kids ask them when is he going to finish building the treehouse
PLOT POINT!
Turns out Michael (Sandler) has a whole lot on his plate, than building a FUCKING! Treehouse, The Smarmy Well-to-do O'Doyles, A hellish Commute and his dick of a boss played by David Hasselhoff, who is a sexual harassment Suit waiting to happen (And Is That Sophie "No junk in the trunk" Monk i see? In a film with another actors i hate? WHAT IS THIS? A HOLLYWOOD LEGION OF DOOM?)
And then....(Sigh) SCHIENDER TURNS UP!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ukJ8mBnWxnY
This time, Sandler's Buttock Buddy is playing (though uncredited!) a migonistic Prince, who wants to build a resort so he can perv on Western Women! Ammer (Hassellhoff) being a dick, Makes Michael work overtime, making him miss an important swimming gala, turning up late, he gets an earful from his father, Howard, he also gets uncomfortable meeting Bill the swimcoach who is more of a father figure to Ben than he is!
Cut to the Fourth of July, And Michael's Workaholism is Worrying his mother and daughter, that and beating up some teenagers, Michael has got a cold, Donna is on his case about not spending time with his kids, the final straw is being to stupid to tell a toy helicopter remote with the tv remote, hitting himself in his Potato shaped Head! He storms off to buy an Universal Remote in the Dead of Night. Stopping At Bed, Bath, And Beyond, he Meets Morty (Christopher Walken) who gives a jerk who doesn't know who good he has it, THE MOTHER OF ALL UNIVERSAL REMOTES!
 |
| "AnotHER SAH-TisFIED CustoMER! NAO, AI GAWT TO GO AND....TEACH KEvin SPACEY To be there FOR HIS FAMILY,,,BY MAKING HIM A MISSING PERSON! |
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