Monday, April 19, 2010

BLACK SHEEP REVIEW

HALLO JOE-JACK HERE!
I'm back from me pilgramage t'da dog-shite shaped lioke Da Blessed Virgin! so i'm back doin' Reviews ov Filliums...okay tiome get back intah code!

HOLY MOTHER OF GOD! WHAT A FOOKING FUNNY FILLIUM!
Dis munt oi'm goin't' review a Fillium from Nu Z-land, Black Sheep.

A 'orror komaday Dat turns a country-boys concubine, da sheep inta an instrument ov Terroh!

Da fillium starts wif, natuarally a field of bootiful sheep.
Oi luv sheep (creepily) i really love sheep.

We are introduced t'Henry a boy who is 'erdin da sheep with his da. Henry has a pet sheep called doris he also has bro'her called angus, who is a cripple. and Natuarally, he is bitter of all the love his bro'er is getting. so he kill doris and wears her carcass to frighten Henry. both boys are then told that their father is dead after falling ov a cliff to save a lamb.

fast foward 15 years and henry is a man with a fear ov sheep

Ya big Hand rared sheep are luverly

i really luv sheep!

Meanwhile 2 hippies brak into da farm, one of dem, Grant, has stolen nuclear waste with a lamb insiode. the jar is smashed and da lamb bites grants ear ov!

i had a love bite frem a sheep once!
she was me first love!

Meanwhile we are introduce to the plot. henry has returned t'da farm to sell his share of it t'Angus. while angus is preparing to give a speech. y'see angus has invented his own species of sheep the oatfield ewe

An Evil ewe!

It's not long afore da sheep pass da virus aroun' and revolt against da humans. and its up tah Henry, hippie Experience and farmer tucker t'save da day! but tucker is bitten by a sheep and capture by angus' lab-men.

Experince and Henry are thrown into an offal pit. they escape but run intah grant who is turned intah a sheep-man.
but grant bites henry turning henry slowly into a sheep.

meanwhile angus gets cured and escapes wen da lab-people are killed and tucker steals da cure.

angus -display goes wrong as a army of sheep kill or transforms the audience of townies!

YEAH GO ON YA SHEEP! KILL DHOSE FOOKING TOWNIES!

Angus descents into madness and become obseessed with his oldfield ewe

(looking nervous yeah i never did dat to a sheep!)

Tiome ta Put Da Spuds on!

Angus gets killed, twice, tucker cure henry and all da mutants, da sheep is burned t'death. and our 3 hereos take up organic farming.

so dats Black Sheep. its Silly, it has a nobody cast and its filmed on a budget!

And oi luv ev'ry minute ov it!

If ya luv Shaun ov Da Dead and Zombieland, then black sheep is fer you! be careful though as its still a 'orror fillium, so if ya skrimish look elsewhere!

Dis is Joe-jack da Culchie Saying GET OF MY LAND!
*GUNSHOT!*