Are You Sitting Comfortably?
Then Let Me Begin! Once Upon a Time (The 80's to be exact) A toy-maker wanted to sell their Horse shaped Dollies to the four corners of the world, To that end the toy-maker spent no-expense in using televisual wizardry to give their creations life!
However the spell was cast in the evil cauldron that was a Korean Animation company
...Turned the Dolls into a Sacchirine, Badly Animated, cloying rip-off of Care Bears! With the first Attempt at media cast in the crypt of bad memories, (AKA BANK HOLIDAY MOVIES!)
It would take Divine Intervention to make the toymakers Dream come true
But instead of Divine Intervention, Hasbro made a deal with Faust!
LAUREN FAUST, THAT IS!
By making the cartoon screenwriter the executive producer, the end result became one of the Surprising Success stories in recent television history
Faust's Big Idea?
TURN A CARTOON ABOUT HORSE DOLLIES...INTO LORD OF THE RINGS!
I am Not Joking!
Suddenly, this was a cartoon that had a land, that had a history to it, that had a society to it! The Ponies had hopes and dreams and even flaws and quirks that they would spend seasons getting over. They had morals, but they were presented in a way that was not talking down to the audience, and most importantly the show was funny, action-packed and had some great animation!
But How does the My Little Pony Movie (2017) hold up against the momentum of 7 seasons? Or is there a reason this film's events only had a passing comment in the opener of season 8 and never spoke of again?
Let's Dig into My Little Pony 2017 and find out!
First the Elephant in the Room, The fact that none of the Regular Cast is mentioned on the cover. That said this is a cover with lots of personality! It looks like a Discoball Planet in a Rainbow sky, so it feels like if I look at it too long, Everybody Dance Now will break out in the distance!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LaTGrV58wec
I was going to do a piece on 7 seasons of lore for those who don't watch the show, but well it doesn't matter! You'll see Why!
We Open With a Sweeping shot of Equestria Castle as Ponies have fun at a festival. In the Castle, Twilight Sparkle. one of 4 Alicorn Princesses (an alicorn is a made up term this show invented for a pony with wings and a horn it's a play on words of ALLicorn!. 1 of The 4 (now 5) are the most powerful, godlike even, beings!) is freaking out about asking her fellow princesses a question, so she enters with her pet/unpaid assistant, Spike the Dragon with astrological charts! She wants Celestria, Luna and Cadence, The masters of the Sun, Moon, and Seasons, to alter laws of Physics so Songbird (Sia) has the right Conditions for Fireworks at her concert. Not even Cartoon Ponies with THE POWERS OF GODS! think this is a good idea!
We Cut the other Mains doing their thing (Rainbow clearing clouds with her wings, Pinkie Blowing up Balloons and Breaking Physics, Fluttershy tending to animals, Apple Jack selling cider, and Rarity the fashionista setting up the stage and taking her time to do so), and to stop all the outsiders joking about she has no hands, Unicorns like her can wield magic that work like telekinesis! Rainbow sees this and sets the stage in seconds flat, which she said would be faster with her Sonic Rainboom! All the while Rainbow keeps drinking Applejack's cider faster than the rancher can pour it! I think Rainbow has a problem!
Checking Preparations, Twilight has one of her bouts of Neurosis, Until her friends cheer up the princess in song! Much like my Lala Land review from earlier this year, i will be keeping photos to a bare minimum and not showing any songs to avoid a copyright strike! At least this song is filled with cameos by fan favourite side characters, including 2 cameos of Cat Deeley and Weird Al! It ends with Twilight being on the Business end of Pinkie's Cake Batter Cannon, as she meets Songbird covered in Buttercream!
But the Awkward Silence is interrupted by an Approaching Storm that turns out to be a Final Fantasy Style Airship! Off the Airship, a Porcupine called Grubber (Voice of Michael Pena) announces the arrival of Commander Tempest, (Voice of Emily Blunt) a Hornless Unicorn and Emissary of The Storm King, when Tempest asks for the complete surrender of Equestria, It's Revealed the Storm King did not send one Airship, but a whole Armada!
Equestria is Conquered and Cadence, Celestria, And Luna Turned to Stone, but before Celestria was petrified, she got out a small message about heading to the bad lands in the south and ask for help from the queen of the Hippo-SOMETHING!
Jumping over a waterfall, The Mane 6 and Spike are presumed Dead! Twilight and friends leave the comfort of their home kingdom to find what they think is a kingdom of Hippopotamuses
So, the heroes can't ask for help from their other friends, namely The Griffins, Starlight Glimmer, Discord, Sunburst, The Changelings, the Yaks, that magic chest from the Tree of Harmony, Zecora, or the Six Pillars? Hell, what about the Crystal Empire, with it's sovereign, Cadance turned to Stone, Shining Armour will have no choice but to go to war? But no, we are putting are hopes into leaving for the unknown because of a half finished message? WHY? NO WAIT, LET ME GUESS.....
Tempest is contacted by her boss, the Storm King, a yeti (Liev Schrieber) He needs Twilight, dead or alive or a statue, in the same room as the other Princesses, for a ritual that will siphon all the magics into his cane, and in return, he'll make Tempest's horn whole again
Crossing the Badlands, Our heroes find a Pirate town, all attempts at help become crazy when everyone wants to buy or enslave the ponies, Until a Cat "saves" them, winning all but Twilight's and Spike's Trust with a song! The cat, Capper (Taye Diggs) offers his talents as a guide, in truth he plans to sell the ponies and dragon to a circus, even worse Tempest has just entered the badlands with an army!
After Looking around Capper's Hovel, Twilight uncovers maps to the kingdom of the Hippogriffs, the reside Mount Eris, Except Capper tells her noone has seen them for decades!When Rarity fixes his coat, he is taken aback by that since living in a trade town, everyone wants something for something! Now the Heroes have 2 Bad Guys after them, Virgo, a crimeboss Mole-rat that runs a circus! and the Storm King, Luckily Virgo is Never mentioned again! The Heroes stowaway on an airship. Tempest captures Capper as her Prisoner, but feeling guilty, gives Tempest the wrong info.
Back on the airship the Heroes are discovered by the crew, who are Parrots. They are given orders by Captain Serrano (Zoe Saldana) to Throw them overboard...until they hear the whistle for Lunch Break.
During Lunch, the Parrots Reveal they are Couriers for the Storm King, but they use to be Pirates, After a song about being Awesome! by Rainbow (the word is her catchphrase!), How great being a pirate is! ERR...A SONG LIKE THAT EXISTS ALREADY!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i8ju_10NkGY
(RIP)
The Couriers rip off their uniforms and reveal pirate garb, the airship also reveals Rainbow Macaw looking sails. Seeing this Rainbow does her sonic Rainboom, which is a bad idea since now Tempest can follow the Swashbuckle from the multicoloured vapour trails to Mt. Eris!
When Tempest Boards the Ship. Twilight has a plan. But it's risky and it involves a garbage chute they hide in. Being Jettisoned by Magic, Twilight makeshifts from blankets, rope and a basket and Spike's Dragon fire, a Hot air Balloon
When Tempest boards the ship she is not happy with Capper lying to her, or the parrots turning on the Storm King. She destroys the Swashbuckle with them all on it!
Then Let Me Begin! Once Upon a Time (The 80's to be exact) A toy-maker wanted to sell their Horse shaped Dollies to the four corners of the world, To that end the toy-maker spent no-expense in using televisual wizardry to give their creations life!
However the spell was cast in the evil cauldron that was a Korean Animation company
...Turned the Dolls into a Sacchirine, Badly Animated, cloying rip-off of Care Bears! With the first Attempt at media cast in the crypt of bad memories, (AKA BANK HOLIDAY MOVIES!)
It would take Divine Intervention to make the toymakers Dream come true
But instead of Divine Intervention, Hasbro made a deal with Faust!
LAUREN FAUST, THAT IS!
By making the cartoon screenwriter the executive producer, the end result became one of the Surprising Success stories in recent television history
Faust's Big Idea?
TURN A CARTOON ABOUT HORSE DOLLIES...INTO LORD OF THE RINGS!
I am Not Joking!
Suddenly, this was a cartoon that had a land, that had a history to it, that had a society to it! The Ponies had hopes and dreams and even flaws and quirks that they would spend seasons getting over. They had morals, but they were presented in a way that was not talking down to the audience, and most importantly the show was funny, action-packed and had some great animation!
But How does the My Little Pony Movie (2017) hold up against the momentum of 7 seasons? Or is there a reason this film's events only had a passing comment in the opener of season 8 and never spoke of again?
Let's Dig into My Little Pony 2017 and find out!
First the Elephant in the Room, The fact that none of the Regular Cast is mentioned on the cover. That said this is a cover with lots of personality! It looks like a Discoball Planet in a Rainbow sky, so it feels like if I look at it too long, Everybody Dance Now will break out in the distance!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LaTGrV58wec
I was going to do a piece on 7 seasons of lore for those who don't watch the show, but well it doesn't matter! You'll see Why!
We Open With a Sweeping shot of Equestria Castle as Ponies have fun at a festival. In the Castle, Twilight Sparkle. one of 4 Alicorn Princesses (an alicorn is a made up term this show invented for a pony with wings and a horn it's a play on words of ALLicorn!. 1 of The 4 (now 5) are the most powerful, godlike even, beings!) is freaking out about asking her fellow princesses a question, so she enters with her pet/unpaid assistant, Spike the Dragon with astrological charts! She wants Celestria, Luna and Cadence, The masters of the Sun, Moon, and Seasons, to alter laws of Physics so Songbird (Sia) has the right Conditions for Fireworks at her concert. Not even Cartoon Ponies with THE POWERS OF GODS! think this is a good idea!
We Cut the other Mains doing their thing (Rainbow clearing clouds with her wings, Pinkie Blowing up Balloons and Breaking Physics, Fluttershy tending to animals, Apple Jack selling cider, and Rarity the fashionista setting up the stage and taking her time to do so), and to stop all the outsiders joking about she has no hands, Unicorns like her can wield magic that work like telekinesis! Rainbow sees this and sets the stage in seconds flat, which she said would be faster with her Sonic Rainboom! All the while Rainbow keeps drinking Applejack's cider faster than the rancher can pour it! I think Rainbow has a problem!
Checking Preparations, Twilight has one of her bouts of Neurosis, Until her friends cheer up the princess in song! Much like my Lala Land review from earlier this year, i will be keeping photos to a bare minimum and not showing any songs to avoid a copyright strike! At least this song is filled with cameos by fan favourite side characters, including 2 cameos of Cat Deeley and Weird Al! It ends with Twilight being on the Business end of Pinkie's Cake Batter Cannon, as she meets Songbird covered in Buttercream!
But the Awkward Silence is interrupted by an Approaching Storm that turns out to be a Final Fantasy Style Airship! Off the Airship, a Porcupine called Grubber (Voice of Michael Pena) announces the arrival of Commander Tempest, (Voice of Emily Blunt) a Hornless Unicorn and Emissary of The Storm King, when Tempest asks for the complete surrender of Equestria, It's Revealed the Storm King did not send one Airship, but a whole Armada!
Equestria is Conquered and Cadence, Celestria, And Luna Turned to Stone, but before Celestria was petrified, she got out a small message about heading to the bad lands in the south and ask for help from the queen of the Hippo-SOMETHING!
Jumping over a waterfall, The Mane 6 and Spike are presumed Dead! Twilight and friends leave the comfort of their home kingdom to find what they think is a kingdom of Hippopotamuses
So, the heroes can't ask for help from their other friends, namely The Griffins, Starlight Glimmer, Discord, Sunburst, The Changelings, the Yaks, that magic chest from the Tree of Harmony, Zecora, or the Six Pillars? Hell, what about the Crystal Empire, with it's sovereign, Cadance turned to Stone, Shining Armour will have no choice but to go to war? But no, we are putting are hopes into leaving for the unknown because of a half finished message? WHY? NO WAIT, LET ME GUESS.....
 |
| TOO COMPLEX FOR YOU TO UNDERSTAND! |
Tempest is contacted by her boss, the Storm King, a yeti (Liev Schrieber) He needs Twilight, dead or alive or a statue, in the same room as the other Princesses, for a ritual that will siphon all the magics into his cane, and in return, he'll make Tempest's horn whole again
Crossing the Badlands, Our heroes find a Pirate town, all attempts at help become crazy when everyone wants to buy or enslave the ponies, Until a Cat "saves" them, winning all but Twilight's and Spike's Trust with a song! The cat, Capper (Taye Diggs) offers his talents as a guide, in truth he plans to sell the ponies and dragon to a circus, even worse Tempest has just entered the badlands with an army!
After Looking around Capper's Hovel, Twilight uncovers maps to the kingdom of the Hippogriffs, the reside Mount Eris, Except Capper tells her noone has seen them for decades!When Rarity fixes his coat, he is taken aback by that since living in a trade town, everyone wants something for something! Now the Heroes have 2 Bad Guys after them, Virgo, a crimeboss Mole-rat that runs a circus! and the Storm King, Luckily Virgo is Never mentioned again! The Heroes stowaway on an airship. Tempest captures Capper as her Prisoner, but feeling guilty, gives Tempest the wrong info.
Back on the airship the Heroes are discovered by the crew, who are Parrots. They are given orders by Captain Serrano (Zoe Saldana) to Throw them overboard...until they hear the whistle for Lunch Break.
During Lunch, the Parrots Reveal they are Couriers for the Storm King, but they use to be Pirates, After a song about being Awesome! by Rainbow (the word is her catchphrase!), How great being a pirate is! ERR...A SONG LIKE THAT EXISTS ALREADY!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i8ju_10NkGY
(RIP)
The Couriers rip off their uniforms and reveal pirate garb, the airship also reveals Rainbow Macaw looking sails. Seeing this Rainbow does her sonic Rainboom, which is a bad idea since now Tempest can follow the Swashbuckle from the multicoloured vapour trails to Mt. Eris!
When Tempest Boards the Ship. Twilight has a plan. But it's risky and it involves a garbage chute they hide in. Being Jettisoned by Magic, Twilight makeshifts from blankets, rope and a basket and Spike's Dragon fire, a Hot air Balloon
 |
| ET'S TWAILAIGHT SPORKLES BAYLOONE! |
The ponies reach Mount Eris...and sees it all abandoned as Capper said, they venture into a cavern when they hear singing! Pinkie Pie gets distracted by a glowing light flying around a lotus in a lake, when the Pink Party Pony steps on a trap that causes the cavern to fill with water and swirl into a sewer below, that ends with all the heroes being consciousness
When the heroes come to, They have Bubbles on there heads to breathe air, like having a bubble on your head and nothing else will save you from compression!
They were rescued by a sea-pony called Princess Sky-Star (Voice of Kristen Chenoweth), who explains that the sea Ponies were once Hippogryphs, who has brought the heroes to have an audience with Her Mother, here in the kingdom of Seaquestria
So the Hippogriffs lived on Mount Eris, until the Storm King invaded, But Queen Novou (Voice of Uzo Aduba), used a pink pearl to turn them into their current state!
Novou uses the pearl to turn the 7 into New toys.... i mean Sea-Ponies .(and spike into a puffer fish) When Twilight exclaims that she could use the power of the pearl to turn into something powerful to destroy the Storm King, Queen Novou Refuses in case The King steals this Artifact! Instead the Queen grants Amnesty to the Ponies of Equestria!
Princess Sky-Star is happy that there are now ponies her age (Living at the castle means she has become stir crazy with puppets for friends!) To get Novou On side, Twilight sends the girls to play with Sky-Star as she thinks of a plan.
One Song Later, and it looks like The Queen is about to have a change of heart..Until she finds Twilight stealing the Pink Pearl. As Punishment, the ponies are turned back into their base forms and washed up on Mount Eris!
Feeling Betrayed the Other's leave Twilight and Spike after a huge argument, Feeling sorry for herself, she is easily captured by Tempest, letting Spike get away.
During an exposistive song and an art shift to a paper cut out style, We learn Tempest's Backstory, she was forced to retrieve a ball from a forbidden forest, when her horn was attacked by an Ursa Major, a bear made of Dark Matter! Because of her disfigurement, all others just abandoned her.
Spike finds the others and tells them Twilight was captured, we learn that Capper, Serrano, and the parrots all had Disney deaths! Even Sky-Star has turned into a hippogriff to join forces!
Back in Equestria all of the ponies are enslaved, The Storm King Siphons all the four princesses magic into his Spectre, stealing the powers of the sun, moon, seasons and the life-time of spells Twilight has learned
Let's finish this 2018!
The heroes do the Trojan Horse in cake before, Grubber catches them! The Parrots Spring out and Attack, at every pass, Capper, Sky-Star and Spike are left to deal with the Army. With the Power of 4 Alicorns, the Storm King creates a storm of Biblical proportions! After Welching on their Deal, Twilight saves Tempest from a lightning Bolt!
The Only way to enter the Castle with that much turbulence is with Pinkie's Cake Batter Cannon, The Blast containing 5 Ponies and spike, knocks the sceptre out of the storm king's talons, but the Wand continues to fire! a gust of wind knocks Twilight and the storm king over the end as they reach for it, but Twilight is alive, but so is the Storm King, planning a sneak attack with a Petrification spell, Tempest charges the King as both are turned to stone in midair, As the Storm king shatters on contact, Twilight revives the Princesses and Tempest, as Sia as Songbird sings us out with Rainbow, the song she released to promote this movie!
THIS FILM IS A SOLID 3 STARS!
Once you Get over all the reviews by fanboys going "EEEEEE!!! PONEH'S GOT A FILM!" and find this review, i will give it to you straight: If you like MLP:FIM then that means you have watched all 7 prior seasons. I was going to do a companion piece to explain storyline arcs, but all the backstory was taken out like so many franchise films. Sure the Animation had a buff, and the film has celebrity voices (SOMEWHAT! DOES ANYONE KNOW WHAT KRISTEN CHENOWETH ACTUALLY DO BESIDES BEING ON THOSE YEARLY WORST DRESSED LISTS?) But let's not forget this was a film to sell a new line of toys!
If you like the show, like i do, Fine! This film will not convince people Otherwise!
CREDITS
My Little Pony The Movie (2017) was Reviewed, Compiled and Edited by Eamonn Bermingham (@RealEnli)
With Media From
My Little Pony the movie (1984)
The Simpsons
My Little Pony the Movie (2017)
Father Ted
Power Rangers Megaforce
And Music
"Everybody Dance Now!" By C&C Music Factory
and "You Are A Pirate " From the tv show Lazy Town!
My Little Pony & My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic are properties of Hasbro.
My Little Pony The movie was Released by Universal Studios!
NEXT TIME!
YOU'RE THE ONE THAT I WANT! YOU ARE ONE THE ONE I WANT....
BUT NOT YOU!
NEXT YEAR I REVIEW GREASE 2! PRAY FOR ME!
One Song Later, and it looks like The Queen is about to have a change of heart..Until she finds Twilight stealing the Pink Pearl. As Punishment, the ponies are turned back into their base forms and washed up on Mount Eris!
Feeling Betrayed the Other's leave Twilight and Spike after a huge argument, Feeling sorry for herself, she is easily captured by Tempest, letting Spike get away.
During an exposistive song and an art shift to a paper cut out style, We learn Tempest's Backstory, she was forced to retrieve a ball from a forbidden forest, when her horn was attacked by an Ursa Major, a bear made of Dark Matter! Because of her disfigurement, all others just abandoned her.
Spike finds the others and tells them Twilight was captured, we learn that Capper, Serrano, and the parrots all had Disney deaths! Even Sky-Star has turned into a hippogriff to join forces!
Back in Equestria all of the ponies are enslaved, The Storm King Siphons all the four princesses magic into his Spectre, stealing the powers of the sun, moon, seasons and the life-time of spells Twilight has learned
Let's finish this 2018!
The heroes do the Trojan Horse in cake before, Grubber catches them! The Parrots Spring out and Attack, at every pass, Capper, Sky-Star and Spike are left to deal with the Army. With the Power of 4 Alicorns, the Storm King creates a storm of Biblical proportions! After Welching on their Deal, Twilight saves Tempest from a lightning Bolt!
The Only way to enter the Castle with that much turbulence is with Pinkie's Cake Batter Cannon, The Blast containing 5 Ponies and spike, knocks the sceptre out of the storm king's talons, but the Wand continues to fire! a gust of wind knocks Twilight and the storm king over the end as they reach for it, but Twilight is alive, but so is the Storm King, planning a sneak attack with a Petrification spell, Tempest charges the King as both are turned to stone in midair, As the Storm king shatters on contact, Twilight revives the Princesses and Tempest, as Sia as Songbird sings us out with Rainbow, the song she released to promote this movie!
THIS FILM IS A SOLID 3 STARS!
Once you Get over all the reviews by fanboys going "EEEEEE!!! PONEH'S GOT A FILM!" and find this review, i will give it to you straight: If you like MLP:FIM then that means you have watched all 7 prior seasons. I was going to do a companion piece to explain storyline arcs, but all the backstory was taken out like so many franchise films. Sure the Animation had a buff, and the film has celebrity voices (SOMEWHAT! DOES ANYONE KNOW WHAT KRISTEN CHENOWETH ACTUALLY DO BESIDES BEING ON THOSE YEARLY WORST DRESSED LISTS?) But let's not forget this was a film to sell a new line of toys!
If you like the show, like i do, Fine! This film will not convince people Otherwise!
CREDITS
My Little Pony The Movie (2017) was Reviewed, Compiled and Edited by Eamonn Bermingham (@RealEnli)
With Media From
My Little Pony the movie (1984)
The Simpsons
My Little Pony the Movie (2017)
Father Ted
Power Rangers Megaforce
And Music
"Everybody Dance Now!" By C&C Music Factory
and "You Are A Pirate " From the tv show Lazy Town!
My Little Pony & My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic are properties of Hasbro.
My Little Pony The movie was Released by Universal Studios!
NEXT TIME!
YOU'RE THE ONE THAT I WANT! YOU ARE ONE THE ONE I WANT....
BUT NOT YOU!
NEXT YEAR I REVIEW GREASE 2! PRAY FOR ME!
